I hate engineers. I hate engineering. This whole god damn profession is populated by nit-picky little assholes who have nothing better to do than call down your very best effort. I think the concept of the professional engineer should be abolished. Rather that appreciate it as a duty to protect the public, the sanctimonious twits use it as a cudgel with which to beat you into submission. I think engineers should be in the business of getting things done. Their daily efforts should be expended towards improving the lives of people. They should be helpful and courteous, not aggressive and confrontational. Unless someone can give me a good reason why I shouldn't just pack it in, go back to Saskatoon, and pump gas or something, I really think I might. I don't need this aggravation. It makes me sick to my stomach, and I feel like vomiting. I give my best effort, I try to act with dilligence and consideration, and I get told (in implied words because an engineer would never come right out and say what he thinks) that I'm a slacker who isn't trying. I stayed up all night Tuesday night creating a drawing for him because I knew he wanted it right away. Do I get a thanks for promptly filling his request? No, I get told I'm not meeting my obligations. I'm well behind schedule on producing the shop drawings. How is that my fault? You pick apart everything I give you. At the rate with which this is being handled, I could have submitted a drawing package the day of the site meeting, and I still wouldn't have made all the changes he wanted by the target date.

This is so damn frustrating! If I'm wrong, or I've made a mistake, I'll fix it, no questions asked. But when I'm trying real hard and someone finds fault with everything I do, that is hard to stomach. It makes me want to quit. I'm serious, I really want to quit. I don't need the ulcer this is giving me. Anyone know of a good job with low stress? Gas jockey, video store clerk, anything?

Toodles. :-(

I'm done. I'm finished. I'm kaput. I'm every metaphor you can think of for a person who is too tired to stay awake anymore. You name a way to be tired, I'm that. I don't really even have the ambition to write this entry but I know that if I leave it for later, it won't get done. I anticipate accomplishing little more than sitting erect and breathing this afternoon.

This relates back to my previous entry about the engineer asking for a simpler drawing. I started it Monday afternoon and after a lot of puzzlement I realized that it wasn't going to be as easy to do as anyone guessed. In fact it was going to be damn hard! And it was hard but even I couldn't predict how tough it truly was. Long story short, I stayed up all night (save a one hour nap around 4:00) finishing this low tech, 2D drawing. All told I probably put 12-14 hours into creating it. I thought it was going well enough yesterday afternoon that I could finish it by the end of the day. How wrong I was! Naively I answered, this afternoon, when the engineer called me to inquire about it. He was way more polite to me than he ever has been in the past but it was pretty evident that he wanted this drawing right away. I like to think I'm a man of my word so when I said I'd have it finished that afternoon, I felt obligated to work on it at home, and get it finished for the morning. I finally got it send off about 10:30. We had to have a staff meeting, and a company picture in between. It was mostly done when I came to the office this morning. I just touched up a few final things, and dimensioned and labelled it. I REALLY hope he appreciates that drawing.

Sorry folks but I'm going to have to wrap it up here. My brain has already shut down and thinking is not a process that I'm having any success with. With some luck I'll feel better tomorrow and can write a better entry.

Toodles!

My day has been made. Hell, my whole week has been made, and its only Monday! Christ, this may be the highlight of my career so far. It was one of those moments that just resonate with you, and make you feel good throughout. It reaffirms your believe in yourself and your abilities.

This engineer I've been working with phoned me this afternoon. He'd handed me hat a while back about the lax quality of the shop drawings I'd presented him. I won't go into the details but he poked many, large holes in my submission and to make a long story short, said do it over. Anyway, he phoned me this afternoon and I could hear it in his voice from the first thing he said. He was apologizing to me from the start. I'll paraphrasing because I don't remember the exact text of the conversation. He goes into it and he tells me, I'm sorry but I can't use the drawings you sent me. There's nothing wrong with them. They are very good. They are too good. I don't know how to use them. Can you please redo them in a simpler format?

This just makes me howl. After all the grief I'm going through over my work experience, here I get an engineer coming to me and saying, your work is too good. Can you make it simpler so I can copy and paste it into my drawing? I'm so unfit to be a professional engineer, but the quality of my work surpasses that of one of the people judging me. The irony of that is just too rich.

Suffice it to say, this has made me feel real good. I must have some talent in this engineering field that I've chosen, if the work I'm producing can be deemed 'too good' and requires simplification. A person goes to work every day, and does what they're asked. Its not often that you get praise for your efforts. I'm probably luckier than most because I have a very communicative boss, and he does give me praise often. That is a tremedous help to a guy that's had some trouble with his career. But to have it come from an outside source, and be in the form of 'hat in hand' request, just makes me beam from ear to ear. If anyone needs me, I'll be on cloud nine until further notice.

Toodles!