What if they held a cabaret and nobody showed up?

I'm here at Sask. Place, doing my appointed duty as beer purveyor. Its not a terribly useful situation at the current time. I have been here for two hours. I think we're averaging about 3 drinks an hour. At the current rate we won't even cover the power consumption for the lights, and most of them are off.

Reporting live from a very deserted Cabaret Central. . .

I have a question.

Why do people even bother opening between Christmas and New Year's Day? I can see the point of it with stores. After Christmas you have major sales to clear out your inventory, that was acquired for the Christmas season. I'd guess that stores actually do a good business during this week.

But what about normal offices, government institutions, construction, administrative, otherwise paper pushing businesses. What is accomplished by being open? Half the people take some vacation time anyway, and aren't there to answer their phone. The other half that come in, can't accomplish anything anyway, because that first half is needed, for answering questions, fulfilling requests, checking stock levels, etc. With such a massive number of people taking time off, it pretty much grinds the whole business world to a stop. Why not, instead, just mandate that everyone is taking X number of days at Christmas time, and don't even bother with the pretext of being 'open'. You're open, but you're not doing anything. Its just boring.

This is my thought. I could be wrong.

Toodles!

Blog Question Of The Day:

What's the most disgusting drink you have ever had?

Blog Question Of The Day:

What's the silliest thing you ever bought?

Blog Song Of The Day:

Offspring - Hit That

It never ends.

I wasn't here 10 minutes and I was getting a phone call from the subject of my ever growing neurosis. Its the Christmas holiday season and my enduring gift is to have this place, and these people, haunt me every moment of my day. It is my curse, my damnation. Why can't they just leave me alone for a day?

Grant's tips for 2003, from Saskatchewan Place, equal $445.69.

WooHoo!!!

Blog Question Of The Day:

Where does someone buy a wig?

I know I ranted about this yesterday but, it deserves being said again. People piss me off!

I have a town, with two types of filtration occurring before distribution to the town. Its three days before Christmas, and one of the types of filtration has failed. Readings taken of the water quality prove that the filtered water is actually worse than the raw water (in one respect) There is a definable problem with the process and it needs a remedy.

Its the week of Christmas. The whole world is shutting down for the holiday week. I have a malfunctioning process, and nobody available to go fix it. Furthermore, there is no quick fix solution to the problem. Making the process right again will take several days. Meanwhile there is a town of 2000+ people that need water while they enjoy Christmas.

So I make a decision. I have 15 minutes to choose something, because that's the window between whether I can sent a programmer to the water treatment plant to alter the operation of the plant. I don't have time to ask everyone what to do. I have to choose.

So I choose. I send the programmer, and we bypass the faulty portion of the process. Then I write a piece of correspondence, outlining the problem, the likely cause, and the solution I've enacted, which guarantees the town some treated water until we can come back, after the holiday, to remedy the malfunctioning process.

So what kind of response do I get from the project Engineer? A rude email suggesting I should have run the decision through them, for review and approval. I didn't have that much time. The programmer gave me until the end of the day I decided, so about 15 minutes, to make a choice about what to do. I couldn't give the town untreated water. I considered that unacceptable. So I chose the temporary fix.

Why write me a rude letter? What does that accomplish. If I had any other choice I would have consulted them, and gotten approvals. I didn't have that kind of time. What's accomplished by calling me down. Help me, don't sit on your throne and judge me poorly based on everything I do. Be in the business of solutions, not protecting your own interest. I don't think that's fair. Especially when you know you'll be out of the office yourself, for an extended Christmas break, and will be unreachable. There's a town full of people who's lives are affected by your behaviour. Help them, don't ignore them.

I am mad.

Do you ever look at life, either the reality of it, or the captured moment in a television program, and become totally depressed by it?

I almost forgot something I was going to blog about.

I used my P.Eng. today!

One more day of work has almost been completed. There was less of a beating today, which was a positive. Still hunting the same ponderous beast. I'm not sure I'm winning at all, but I felt like I didn't lose as much today. Gotta look for the positives in life.

People frustrate me. At the end of the day what's really bothering me lately is people. There are problems to be dealt with and the most you can get from anyone is, well that's not specific problem. How does that help me? Okay, maybe its not your particular problem but I'm making the effort to reach out, and seek some assistance with my current state of affairs and I get back, the world won't end. I'm not worried about the world ending, I just wanna put a decent resolution on a screwed up situation. I have trouble with asking for help, so its demoralizing to have my request essentially belittled.

An the same topic of people pissing me off, why do I have to do everything? I got a call this afternoon. The person on the other end wanted me to give them a decision on something. It was about scheduling an installation. That's supposed to be his job. Its nothing complex or intricate, or for that matter anything I've ever dealt with before. But for some reason he felt it necessary to not decide anything himself and call me. I'm in the middle of dealing with my haunting nightmare of a project, and he interjects with a phone call about a dinky 5 gpm unit. AARRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

I think its time for a holiday.

Toodles.

Monday morning dawned with my old nemesis, still square within my sights. The large, hulking beast that is my enemy, will not relent. Like some invincible super-villian of cartoon infamy, it teases and tortures me with cruel lack of mercy. I am beaten, bruised, reduced to pulp. A crying heap in the middle vast plain, that is devoid of anything, least of all hope. I stand, near to broken, wishing only for release.

The morning has dawned with more hope than I've known in some time. The trials and tribulations of a day spent battling a beast that would not be slayed have been forgotten. In my deep focus, on the monster that confronted me, I had forgotten a quest that had begun a long time back in the mist. A melancholy that had dropped its curtain over me, in slow folds of heavy thick velvet, has been lifted. The completion of a long, arduous quest has lifted my spirits for the continued battle with the beast. I now face the day, my chin held high.

I got my P.Eng designation!

Toodles!

Blog Question Of The Day:

In general, which looks better, home or away uniforms?

The beast is winning.

Each stab at its black heart, does little more than scratch at the coarse, leathery exterior that protects this demon from harm. Attempts to slay this hedious beast are all repelled, and seem only to enrage the cold monster. On swipe from a rusty, pitted sword is met with a roar of fury, that alone is nearly enough to fell any warrior, no matter how hale or hardy. With each attempt to press forward, comes a ferocious blast of sulphur and burning fire. One must shield their face from the intensity.

And the sword falls.

On your knees, you search in the dirt, and scorched grass for the only weapon you can possibly wield. But even wielding it is of little consequence. On your knees, or standing proudly on your feet, no quarter is given. And you slip. And you lose ground. The beast wins. Not by superior skill but simple brutality by size. It swarms you, engulfs you, swallows you whole until you're fighting from within the beast.

And once you are within, there is no escape. You are trapped, sealed in for an eternity, lost to anything and everything you've known and loved. It holds you, captured in a moment from which you can not escape. Cold, brutal reality engulfs you, and takes you down. On your knees you wail.

No one hears.

I hate chemistry!

AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here it is, a new day, and I have a new complaint.

Why can't clothing manufacturers be more consistent in the production of garments? I needed some new jeans awhile back, and went to the store and bought some. I wanted two pair, so I got two identical ones. I tried one pair on, and they fit nicely, so I took another, identically size, pair.

I wore them back to back this week. Yesterday's pair were very snug. Not uncomfortably, sausage casing snug, but definitely full enough to know I had on tight pants. Today I wear the second, SUPPOSEDLY IDENTICAL, pair. I'm almost swimming in them. If I put enough stuff in my pockets, I could probably make them fall part way down.

So my question becomes, where's the quality control? They are tagged the same, so why aren't they the same? That just bugs me.

However, this is just my opinion, I could be wrong.

Toodles.

It is Tuesday, and as such, its Newlyweds and The Simple Life on CTV.

I missed this the first time. On Newlyweds today is the episode where they go camping. All around, a very funny episode. However, something happened that I missed the first time.

One of the activities the two couples indulge in is, a kind of quiz game, where you read questions out of a book and everyone has to answer. Stuff like, if you could have the body or mind of a 30 year old, when you were 90, which would you pick? But, I digress. Nick takes a long time to think about all of his answers, which pisses Jessica off because their 'true love' type questions. The ask three of these in a row and Nick thinks about each one, and Jessica gets annoyed. Finally the question comes up, do you envy anyone enough that you'd want to switch lives with them? Nick again thinks about his answer. Then, as a joke, he mentions Bruce Willis. Jessica mildly freaks. To mollify her, Nick makes the comment, I get to bang Jessica Simpson, why would i want to be someone else?

Now THAT, is funny! 8-D

Toodles.

I hate Souris!

AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I drove a trailer today. Well, not the actual trailer. I guess the accurate thing to say would be, I towed a trailer. It was an interesting experience. I've never done that before. It wasn't really all that hard, or difficult an endeavour. I worried constantly about dumping the membrane unit I was hauling but in the end, even after manuevering it over rough, rutted ground, I didn't dump it, and we got the unit in the building. I consider it a success.

Meanwhile my old nemesis has jumped up to bite me in the ass again. Thus, despite an early day success, I find myself depressed. When is this going to end?

Toodles

I think I have found the perfect example of how Saskatoon is not able to really progress as a city. This example I'm about to give is symptomatic of why Saskatoon is so frustrating to live in.

As you leave Saskatoon, going east, on Highway 5 to Humboldt, there is an intersection of highway and urban road. I forget exactly what street it is the butts into Highway 5, but it leads out of the new subdivision on the east side. I think its called McOrmond Road. I've been driving this stretch of road weekly, for almost two years now. You blaze into Saskatoon and don't hit a light until you get to Central Avenue, coming out of Sutherland.

Now they have a set of lights on the highway. This just bothers me. This is a highway. You are no longer 'in' Saskatoon as you take Highway 5 out from Saskatoon. The city itself is either behind you, or off to your left, as you leave the city. And here is a stupid set of traffic lights out in the middle of nowhere.

I understand why they are there. I realize that an abundance of people probably take this stretch of highway, as a shortcut to and from work, into their homes in Erindale. I am aware that these lights are probably necessary, for the two stretches of rush hour that occur on weekdays.

What gets on my nerves is, for 22 out of 24 hours in the day, the particular stretch of road does not need lights, at all. Traffic into and out of Erindale, on McOrmond Road, is light. They also build a merge road out of Erindale, onto Highway 5, so people leaving Erindale can easily merge into Highway 5 traffic. So what results is, this set of lights is only necessary for left turns across Highway 5, into Erindale, on McOrmand Road.

Let's be honest here. Is there ever so much traffic on Highway 5 into Saskatoon, that we need to stop it, and let left turns happen? Couldn't a long left turn lane be provided, so that you could queue up plenty of cars during rush hour, taking them out of highway traffic, and let them make their left turns as possible? I really fail to see the wisdom of putting lights at this particular location.

That's my opinion, I could be wrong.

Blog Question Of The Day:

Which gets you cleaner, a shower or a bath?

From this day forward, Kevin Hills, of Saskatoon, Saskatchewan will be known by all that see him as, The Man.

I have a thought for you today people. Its something that came to me this evening, as I stood at the Snoop Dogg concert watching the crowd.

Why would you bring a cell phone to a rock concert? Okay, maybe you bring it with you, but why would you try talking on it? The sound quality of a cell phone is questionable at the best of times, and you're going to try and put together a coherent conversation in the din of a pounding rap show? This is insane. And yet, I noticed more that one person, pacing back and forth on the concourse, speaking animately into a cell phone. I'm sure all the tension was from having to repeat themselves five times before comprehension was reached.

Tip to idiot cell phone people. Just because you have it on you, does not mean you are obligated to use it ever minute of the day. Put down the phone, and go watch the concert.

Geesh.

Something unusual happened to me today. Well, not so much to me, but I was witness to it. I saw a car wreck.

I was coming north on Warman Road from downtown. I was passing the Shell station on the corner of Warman and Assiniboine. The light for the intersection turned yellow as I approached. It happened late enough that the best idea was for me to just go through it. I know, not the nicest thing to do, I could have tried to stop, but I wasn't running a red or anything. It was still yellow as I passed the light standards.

There was a truck waiting to turn left. I went through the yellow, and he was still stopped in the turn lane facing me. I went through, and after I'd passed the 7-11, or at least a couple seconds later, I looked in my rearview mirror. The truck was beginning his left hand turn. By now the yellow I'd gone through should have been a solid red. Someone tried to run the light. They didn't make it. The late model, grey four door sedan, hammered into the engine section of this old truck that was making a left hand turn.

I'd never seen anything like that before. I'd been in collisions but this was a full blown car wreck. The car was at full speed limit speed, or better, and the truck was in motion too. The front end of the car got mashed badly, and the truck was spun sideways by the impact. I had to look away and pay attention on driving, but before I stopped watching some smoke or steam was surrounding the scene.

It was kind of surreal to watch this in my rearview mirror. It reminds me of the time I saw a tornado in my rearview mirror as I was coming home on 51st Street. I suppose its a bad thing to witness, but there was a sense of detached curiousity.

I have another complaint.

What's wrong with people? We complain about gas going up to $0.749 a litre. We act like we're being robbed blind. Then we go to the convenience store and buy a Coke, or similiarly bottle product and pay $1.65 for 591 mL. I did the math folks, that's $2.79 a litre. If we're getting robbed anywhere at the gas station, its at the soft drink counter, not the gas pump.

Which is not to say I'm happy about the current state of gas prices. I'd like them to be lower. I'm just saying there are greater consumer injustices out there in the world.

I have a complaint. Its about cell phones. Not so much the phones themselves, but the people that use them. Don't call me, on your cell phone, with a situation that you consider to be of dire emergency. Spur me to a quick resolution, then have me phone you back on your cell phone. IF you're going to do all of this, at least make sure that you have some freakin' coverage wherever you are so I can, in fact, get a hold of you. How freakin' useless is it to make me do a panic fix on something, only to be unavailable to any kind of contact!?!

I HATE THAT!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We haven't done this in awhile, a joke.

God said, "Go down into that valley!"
And Adam said, "What's a valley?" and God explained it to him.
Then God said, "Cross the river!"
And Adam said "What's a river?" and God explained it to him.
And then God said, "Go over the hill!"
And Adam said, "What's a hill?" and God explained it to him.
Then God told Adam, "On the other side of the hill, you will find a cave!"
And Adam said, "What's a cave?" and God explained that to him.
Then God said, "In the cave you will find a woman!"
And Adam said, "What's a woman?" so God explained that to him.
Then God said, "I want you to reproduce."
And Adam said, "How do I do that?" So God explained it to him.
So off went Adam, down into the valley, across the river, and over the hill, and into the cave, and found the woman, and in about five minutes he was back.
God said angrily, "What is it now?!"
And Adam said, "What's a headache?

I had a rough night last night. When I went to bed last night I had a slight headache behind me eyes. I thought maybe it was from the contact lenses so I took them out to go to sleep. (You are supposed to be able to sleep in these ones I have now) I woke up about 2:30 last night with the worst headache of my life. I thought I was having an anyeurism. I couldn't stand it. I had to get up, struggle upstairs to the bathroom and get some ibuprofen. (The medicne cabinet is in the upstairs bathroom for some reason.) Spent a fitful while after that before falling asleep again. That was brutal. Consequently I was still tired when the alarm clock woke me this morning. I fell back asleep for twenty minutes after it roused me, and ended up a few minutes late for work. Had that headache persisted into the morning I think I'd have stayed home today. That was horrible.

I know, not a very spiritually uplifting blog for the morning. I'll see if something more exciting happens over the rest of the day.

Toodles!

It is Tuesday and that brings us 'Newlyweds' and 'The Simple Life' on CTV. I won't go into Newlyweds because these are all repeats now. It does surprise me how a gorgeous celebrity could be so insecure but I guess people are people. Which brings us to, The Simple Life. Here is a show I just can't make up my mind about. I know its not very good and yet, I would be lying if I didn't say that I enjoyed this weeks episode.

Tonight Paris and Nicole got jobs, new ones yet again, at the Sonic Burger restaurant in town. Just wondering how a town of 817 could have a fast food restaurant, but I digress. Anyway, the girls were working in the restaurant and not unpredictably, screwed everything up. Actually, it was more Nicole than Paris this time. Paris actually seemed to get the hang of taking and filling orders. Nicole screwed everything up. They were equal partners in the sign fiasco, and storming the grocery store in the Sonic costumes. As Nicole was screwing up onion rings, Paris seemed to have cooking bacon under control. My review of their performance would be, without Nicole, Paris might actually have been able to hold the Sonic job.

Which brings me to what I find to be the fatal flaw in this show. The action is obviously being directed or scripted. I don't deny that the same thing may happen on other reality shows, but its far less apparent. It is quite easy to tell that this pair is screwing up on purpose. Which would be fine, if the premise was based on the idea of the girls trying every job available in a small town. But the pitched idea, to us the public at least, was they were supposed to adapt to The Simple Life. Losing every job you get isn't very good adaptation.

Maybe the problem is mine in that I expect more from the show than laughing at a couple of rich dim bulbs. I think that's what we're supposed to take from this misadventure. I have to say though, it would be more fulfilling to laugh at their misfortunes if you got the impression they were actually trying, and it was the culture shock that made them screw up. Anyone could just lose a job a day, and do it with more personality. The best moments of the show are when the pair honestly don't know something that the rest of us take for granted, like claiming dependents on your tax form.

In summation, I give it a 7. The show still sucks but this one was more fun than the first two.

Toodles!

Does anyone know what angel food cake tastes so much better than regular cake?

I had a peculiar dream last night.

I don't know why, or where, this dream came from. I was in Swift Current. That's the name I had attached to the place I was, but I wasn't actually there. The dream started at Greg's house, which for some reason I took to be my parent's house. My relatives, from my Mom's side of the family came to visit. I was just leaving as they were coming in. I had to go to Zeller's for something. Which, despite being Greg's house, was still right across the street.

I was prowling around Zellers when I came across this $1 shoe bin. They had some of those mesh shoes, which I siezed upon as a great idea for my trip to Mexico that is upcoming. So I'm picking through this shoe bin, looking for a pair that are my size. In here I find canvas, Chuck Taylor All-Star sneakers, like I've been looking for, for some time. Trouble is, there are no matched pairs. Just to shorten this up a bit, I find myself a set of blue mesh shoes, and a mismatched set of red, Converse sneakers.

I go to pay for this stuff, and a few other incidentals (2 L of Pepsi, etc) and I realize that I don't have my wallet. Just $14 in cash. Luckily it enough, but my Mom is walking past the checkout. I call her over, to see if she can lend me some money, but as it turns out my bill is only $11, so I'm okay. She takes this opportunity to tell me to hurry up, because we have company.

For some reason I figure I've got time to go for a drive. So I get in my truck and cruise around. I head downtown, such as I imagine it, following someone in a white car. They turn around on what looked like 2nd Avenue and 20th Street in Saskatoon, because of road construction. I tried to chase after them, but lost them in the checkerboard of criss crossing downtown streets. At one point I was driving down this long, long, long street, which reminded me of Rosser Ave in Brandon, at the legally posted speed limit of 90 km/h. I still didn't catch the white car.

Eventually I ended up not in downtown anymore. I tried to find this 2nd Avenue street, on the Rosser Avenue street, but it never seemed to intersect. I found myself in an outskirt region. I noticed a golf course and got out and started walking around the fairways. This course was completely unfamiliar to me, so I got lost. I had no idea where I was, or how to get anywhere that would help me. I had the vague notion that I should look for the clubhouse, but I didn't know where that was. I dug my PDA out of my pocket and turned it on to see if I could get wireless internet. Lo and behold I could. I pulled up a map of the golf course but the resolution of the map was so fine that I couldn't really figure out what it said, with my small PDA screen. I tried anyway, and kept wandering this course.

Al some point I ran into my Dad on this course. He was lost too, and we needed to get off this course and get home, because of the company. So we wandered up and down fairways, looking for the clubhouse. I checked my watch and it was 3:30. We still had time, as the deadline we had gotten from somewhere was 6:00. But even together, we couldn't find our way off this golf course. Everytime we'd think we were close, the building we thought was the clubhouse, would turn out to be something else, or we'd make a turn to get closer to our destination, only to find ourselves further away. At some point we acquired a golf cart, and golf clubs, but never could we make it to the clubhouse. Time and again we'd go over lush green fairways, or skirt nicely manicured greens, on our way towards a clubhouse looking building, only to find it wasn't what we wanted.

6:00 came and we still hadn't found the clubhouse. Frustration of a severe kind was setting in. In the distance we saw a fancy looking building, with multiple sets of windows and a general clubhouse look to it. We set off in that direction but as we got close, we realized it was actually someone's house. As we started to get mad someone, (we'd been talking to people the whole time we were tooling around this course) asked us if we were going to go to the clubhouse. We said that's what we'd been looking for all along. He started towards it himself and nodded his head in the direction of his destination. It was this silver, quonset little building. In all out searching THAT was the clubhouse!?! We'd passed it at one point, when we'd been near the driving range, but hadn't realized what it was. Our dismay at this realization was fairly palpable.

That's about all I remember from the dream. There was some other remembrance of the Toronto Maple Leafs playing a hockey game in a small town arena, but I don't remember enough details about that to write about. The golf dream is quite vivid in my mind though. What it means I have no clue. Maybe its just random images?

Toodles!

Big news!!!

I just got a voice mail message from my boss. As of November 29th, we were granted Substantial Completion on the project in Souris. This means that it has been acknowledged that we have delivered a completed system to the client.

There should be no more exhausting treks to Souris anymore. I know there will be some deficiencies that will require some time in Souris but, those can be looked at as warranty type issues, not contract holdup items. There is some changes we need to make to the chemical feed system, and one of the booster pumps need service, but the job is done, for the most part. This is a huge relief.

I think I will quietly enjoy the rest of my day. Toodles!

Blog Question Of The Day:

Should I join the Columbia House DVD Club?

This just in!!!

Like the pondering footsteps of some mythological giant, the project that is Souris has inched one more step towards its final resolution. Kicking and screaming with every moment, the giant beast has been shoved towards the line in the sand that marks completion, and the end to our travels into that land.

The herculean efforts of our staff, and the assistance we have acquired, have brought us within grasp of the thin ribbon that marks the end of this marathon. The last, gasping steps are upon us, as we struggle mightily to the finish. With some luck, and an ounce of good fortune, the last of our stays in that unforgiving place will end this week. A wonderful Christmas gift to people that have earned it.

Toodles!

I watched 'The Simple Life' tonight. It followed directly after 'Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica' and failed in the comparison. The biggest problem? The two stars of The Simple Life just don't have as much charisma as Nick & Jessica. On the scale of celebrity, there's a reason why Nick and Jessica have pop culture careers and Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie are famous only for being famous. The pair of princesses from The Simple Life have almost no charisma.

It doesn't help that neither girl is very attractive. They fit the mold of what 'should' be attractive but for some reason it just doesn't work. First of all Paris. She's just too skinny. I know that shouldn't really be an issue, in the currently popular view of feminine beauty but it is. She's too skinny. It just doesn't look right. Paris has the look of a girl that hasn't eaten in about two weeks. A statement which is probably true. Add a few pounds girl, it'll look good on you.

Nicole Ritchie? Who the hell is that? She wins the personality Olympics in this duo, but its only by a whisker, and a thin one at that. Again its another example of, should be attractive but really isn't. I can't tell you why though. It just doesn't work. Maybe because its plain dressed up like its something good. Nicole is marginally more likeable but still not captivating by any stretch.

Will this show work? Probably. There is some amusement in watching these total princesses fail miserably at everything they encounter. Their ride to the farm is a pickup truck. See their mortified faces. Their room has a well grate in the middle of it. See the stunned looks. The girls go grocery shopping and are dismayed at what they find in the store. See their confused looks when they don't have enough money. The girls balk at plucking chickens. This time their expressions are horrified. But, perhaps the best looks were reserved for the farm family when Paris asked what Wal-Mart was.

There is some amusement in watching these two fish be completely out of water. Its not really good entertainment though. You just don't get the feeling that these two are going to learn anything from their experience. Just how they carry themselves, it looks like one big goof for them. For the show to really work, being on the farm would need to change the two of them, at least a little bit, and I'm not expecting it to happen. They showed some clips from upcoming episodes and that's how I draw my conclusion.

That is my review of The Simple Life. Expectations are low. I'll comment again after the next episode.

Toodles.

Blog Question Of The Day:

Porno tongue, or church tongue?

Something has to change.

I keep thinking I've gotten to the end of my rope, only to find another rope hanging from that first one. Time and again, I end up further down the spiral, with the top of the climb so far above me that its lost in the mist.

I keep trying, and I keep failing. Not because I haven't given my best effort, or haven't made an attempt to survive the quest. No, I keep failing because for every one person that I satisfy, there are three others that leave frustrated and pissed off at me because I didn't have time for them, or couldn't provide what they ask for.

So I think something has to change. I wake up in the morning and I know I'm going to fail. I come to work and I know that at the end of my day, I will not have satisfied even 50% of the requests that are put at me. I put my head down on the pillow at the end of the night and I can be sure that I will have frustrated and alienated at least one friend.

Somehow it has to stop. I'm tired of being stretched as far as one person can be stretched. I'm tired of hurting the people I care about, not out of negligence or lack of care, but simply because I can't do it all.

I want this situation remedied. I want my life to be different. I've hurt people and I didn't mean to. I've disappointed people because I couldn't do it all. To everyone who has come to me wanting something, and gone away untended, I am sorry. My lack of attention was not intended, and your situation ignored. I just failed at accomodating everyone.

I am sorry. I have tried and I have failed. Please forgive me.

Something has to change.

Blog Question Of The Day:

Does anyone like the balogna with the seeds in it!?!

My ear hurts and I appear to be bleeding from it. This can't be good, can it?

Blog Question Of The Day:

Should I start drinking Kool-Aid again?

Have you ever sat and wondered, how much pie could I eat in one sitting?

Can someone explain this to me?

I have 100 channels. I have 200 channels. I have channels that go up into the 700's on my on screen guide. How is it then that I can have all these channels and then still be unable to find anything I want to watch!?!

I wish I knew more.

Life kind of frustrates me some days. Actually, it frustrates me a lot of days. I'll be cruising along at a nice pace, and then something will come up to disrupt my comfortable groove. And this will be something I won't know the answer for. That's not such a big deal. I'll go find the answer and resolve the issue. The part that frustrates me is, the question will open me to a wealth of information that lead me to the answer, and I'll come to grips with the concept of knowing little, when I thought I knew lots.

I suppose that's not such a big problem. No one can know everything, its just not possible. And I don't expect that I do, nor can, know everything. But its awe inspiring to look for an answer to a question, and realize just how much knowledge there is in the world about any particular topic. And what makes it awe inspiring, at least to me, is that I could read and research and pursue knowledge on any one thing for the whole of my life, and not get it all. That's just picking ONE thing, and trying to learn everything about it. In the course of a day I might go look for two or three unique answers, and coming to all that knowledge makes me want to know it all. Multiply that across a whole week, and a month, and a year? There is so much knowledge in the world and I could work my whole life and never touch even a fraction of it. That inspires and humbles me at the same time.

Chim-pan-zees!!! :-P

Blog Question Of The Day:

What song reminds you of sex?

Star Wars: Knights Of The Old Republic

Mark it down wherever you mark stuff down. I want to play this game so if any kind souls are looking for a Christmas gift for me, that'd be a good choice.

My active Souris file, which is filled with miscellaneous correspondence, spec sheets, incidental documentation, and other filing of project minutiae is 3-1/2 inches thick.

Song of the Day:

Barenaked Ladies - Another Postcard



. . .


Hey Melissa! Chim-pan-zees!!! :-P

Can't blog

. . .

Infected with plague

. . .

Much too weak

. . .

Will blog again when fully a zombie

Brandon, we have a problem.

The chalupa is gone from the Taco Bell menu. This is a problem. I love the chalupa. Sure, you can feel your arteries seizing up as you eat it, but its SO good. I specifically went to Taco Bell last night to get a chalupa, and it wasn't there. I tried substituting a gordita but it just wasn't the same. The Taco Bell experience was good but, I missed my chalupa.

So far my latest trip to Souris has been a disappointment. First, I get here and we're shut down on producing water for a bateriological test. Then I try for Taco Bell, with the experience I mentioned above. Now I'm trying to get an email attachment onto a piece of paper, so I can use it, and I'm stymied on that front too. This is all very disillusioning.

I hope the rest of you are well. Toodles!

So I'm going to order a pizza for supper tonight. What's the deal with these restaurants? How can you start at medium? Doesn't the very definition of medium mean, its in the middle?

From dictionary.com:

medium - Something, such as an intermediate course of action, that occupies a position or represents a condition midway between extremes.

You can't start with medium! If you start with medium, that's the small. Its small, medium and large. Not, medium, large, and extra large! Who do you think you're fooling!

AARRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!

We just had a staff meeting. Kind of a weird experience really. People have been very childish lately, getting their feelings hurt by small things, making unintentional slights and examples of overlooking into monstrous transgressions. I stood in the middle of this meeting and had to listen to my boss rail at this people, adults, about how they were being childish. He seemed to be on the verge of a emotional breakdown, as he passionately poured out his heart about what he was trying to accomplish.

It was a little sad to listen to. He's baring his soul for these people, and they can't get past $10, or someone forgetting to say a thank you directly to them, or someone voicing their dissenting opinion in a way that's too strident. There were individuals that actually tried to justify their own reasons for actions, in the face of this passionate appeal for reason from my boss. But their opinions were hollow. It boiled down to a us vs. them mentality and its not fair. They talked about, having votes, versus, one person administrating. Well, you did a whole bunch of stuff, and I never got a vote on any of it. Can you really play the democratic card if you aren't polling everyone?

It all just pisses me off. Why can't grown ups actually act, grown up? One of life's mysteries I suppose.

Blog Song of the Day

Dropkick Murphys - Time to Go

Blog Question of the Day

Have you ever wanted to microwave yourself, just to see what it feels like?

I didn't blog on Wednesday. Did anyone notice?

Its interesting how things make it around on the internet. A couple weeks ago I got an email from someone that had the tagline of 'Sask Home Security'. It was some polar bears lounging around in the driveway of a house. It was cute so I renamed it 'Manitoba Home Security' and sent it to a couple of friends of mine in Manitoba, as a gentle dig.

To my surprise I got an email this morning. It was the same polar bears, with the 'Manitoba Home Security' tagline that I'd appended to it. Coincidences are strange, aren't they?

Toodles!

WTF is going on!?!?!?!?!

Can someone explain this to me? Explain it to me like I'm a three year old, I don't care. Just make it make sense to me!

I'm trying to chat with my friends on MSN. The stupid chat client kicks kicking me off, and alternatively telling me that the service is either unavailable, or too busy. But, BUT, when I click help and it takes me to a web page that displays the current status of the .NET system, it says everything is stable and in service.

How can that be? How can it be stable, and in service if I'm either temporarily unavailable, or too busy? That seems like pretty damn unstable to me.

Death to Microsoft!!!!!

I am mad!

I haven't been this angry in awhile. And as usual, its humanity that has incurred my wrath. I just don't understand. People are so infuriating. I have a real, definite problem, and I can't get anyone to care or help. There is nothing more aggravating to me than when I have a problem, that could have a solution, and people get in the way.

I ripped the last contact lens I have for my right eye, on Saturday. My only other source of eyewear is a pair of glasses that I got when I was about 20 years old, so that's nearly 10 years ago. I never updated them because frankly, I never wear eyeglasses. They're on for about 10 minutes a day, between taking out my contacts and going to bed. Its several hundred dollars for new glasses, and I"m not interested in investing that kind of money for 10 minutes a day.

So I need a replacement contact lense. All I was asking for was ONE lens, to get me by until I could schedule an appointment for an exam, and a new perscription. Could anyone help me out that way? HELL NO!!! The precious rule that my perscription was 'expired' was more important than the fact that I'm blind, more or less, over here. "Oh no, we can't be helping you out and giving you one lens on an expired perscription." Oh, but feel free to drive over here, blind, for an appointment. How does that logic work!?!

I was listening to a countdown show on the radio, as I drove across the city this afternoon. I heard them mention a new song, by Michael Jackson with R. Kelly. Where did these two guys meet, group therapy!?!

I need something explained to me.

What's the deal with coffee? Why is it that you can buy a cup of it in the corner shop for 50 cents, or whatever they charge for it, and then they'll continue to refill it ad infinitum, even if you sit there for 3 hours?

This kinda pisses me off. I'm in podunk Manitoba and the only places to acquire sustenance are there small cafes/coffee shops. The coffee is all but free, and plentiful, meanwhile I'm geting absolutely bent over for a glass of soda. For cost of product, the soda versus the coffee is probably next to equal. Meanwhile they want $1.50 for a 10 oz cup of Pepsi, with no refills, but my compatriot can get three coffee refills for 50 cents.

I HATE THAT!!!

Toodles.

I am a complete bone-brain!

I've been fretting about this package (KMnO4 meter) that was being shipped from Alberta, all night. I got a tracking number for the package yesterday, and emailed it to myself at home, so I could track the package last night. The trouble was, I wrote the number down wrong, forgetting one digit . (There were two 4's side by side, and I only wrote one into the email I sent myself) Thus, I have been worried and wondering about this all night, and getting no response from the Purolator, track your package, utility on their website.

All for one number. It pays to be meticulous about these type of things and I was not. And I paid a price in lost sleep for it. On the positive side though, the package is 'Out For Delivery' so it should be in Watson by mid-morning. That makes me happy.

Have a good day people! Mine is looking better now.

Toodles!

I had an interesting dream last night. Its morning though, and much of the coherence is gone now. I'm just going to type for awhile, and see if it brings some memories to light for me.

The main thrust of the dream was centered around this softball game. I wasn't in this dream. It was more like a movie, or a TV show. Maybe it was a softball tournament, because the action kept going back to the field, but shifted away from it on several occasions.

As for characters, I can only remember two people from it with any clarity. One was Zack, from Saved By The Bell fame. Another was an exotic, latin beauty. She looked familiar to me but I don't have a name. There were other, assorted young people in the late teens, early 20's age range, but no one stands out with any definition.

The field where the softball was played was, next to Griffiths Stadium, on the U of S campus. But the football stadium wasn't there. It was just wooded meadows, and grassy fields. The university factored into the dream, which is how I can place the field. And the overhead pedestrian walkway.

To the actual dream now. It started with all the players on the team I was following, scrambling from different places to make it to the game. There was some nebulous, poorly defined sense of doom surrounding the game. The team HAD to win, or something bad would happen. I think they would all die, but I don't know why.

They played the first game. I won't bore you with any details because a) you know what softball is like, and b) I don't remember them with any definition. There were lots of home runs, obviously, and the team won. The field looked really nice, with lush green grass, and vibrant, clay on the basepaths. It was quite colorful.

It was after the first game that things got a a little wierd. Zack took off somewhere and we didn't see much of him anymore. Things centered on the Latin girl. She ended up in this house with some other Latin-looking people, who I presume to be her family. This is the part that was strange. A bunch of masked guys showed up and the house erupted in a massive gunfight. The masked guys took over, and were executing the prisoners, shooting them each in the head. The heroine of the dream escaped the house, but she took a gunshot to the stomach and was bleeding badly. Also escaping was a young boy, who darted around a corner when they shot his father in the head.

There was a chase sequence after that, as the masked guys tried to capture the heroine, and the young boy. Mostly they wanted the boy because it became a royalty type of thing, since as the last surviving son, he would be king. The girl was bleeding badly, and sought refuge with some of the team members that tried to patch her up the best they could. She was going to be needed for the next game. The young boy was chased through the university, staying mostly in buildings, and having shoot ups in large theatres and sumptious looking rooms.

Both of our characters, the would be king and the wounded girl, made it to the final game. This was the ultimate event of the dream. If the team won this game, the girl would survive, and the boy would become king. It was a low scoring game. Lots of defense. Diving catches in the outfield, body sacrificing plays in the infield. Lots of collisions on the basepaths and ferocious play all around. It came down to the last out, and the girl was at bat. Her shirt was stayed deeply with blood, and her eyes were filled with pain. She got a hit, and someone scored from third. They won and the dream ended.

I've missed a LOT of details along the way but this is as much as I can recall. I sure have some detailed dreams!

Toodles.

I'm struggling with a question. Its one that I've puzzled over before, but not come to a satisfactory answer.

Why are the movies I'd want to watch, on at lunch time? I don't understand this at all. At lunch time, the programmers can't be expecting their highest audience numbers. They have to expect that most people are going to watch movies in the evening. So why are all the crappy shows being played in primetime? I turn on the TV and there's some obscure piece of crap Canadian show, or god forbid, what is obviously a 'made for TV' movie from one of the network channels. Why can't they play The Bourne Identity at 7:00 so I can spend half my evening on that, instead of randomly channel surfing, picking up interesting half hour shows along the way?

I really need to get into the entertainment industry and fix all these problems I see. I don't like complaining, I prefer fixing problems, but I don't think I command enough authority with this one. I need to move on this.

Toodles!

Well, I won't be getting any hand modelling jobs in the next little while.

It was a rough day for my hands today. First I'm opening boxes of membranes and I impale the middle finger of my right hand on a packing staple. That was both ugly, and painful. I bled profusely. It required a bandage as I was leaving red mess everywhere.

After that it was all fingernails. I ripped three of them over the rest of the day. None of those injuries were excruciatingly painful but, it netted me some ugly looking hands. On the upside though, its all evidence of having done something today, so I take pride in that.

Its snowing here in Brandon. I hope the rest of you have better weather.

Toodles!

I have a question.

Why is it that all the classes I hated from college, are all turning out to be the ones that I have need for during my career?

First it was surveying. I hated the class, and the camp we had to do on using the equipment. What's the first job I get? Surveying. Then there was the absolute worst class I had to take, project management, and then than one jumps up to be important too. I hated that project management class so much, I haded in a short story as my submission for the one assignment. I got an 80% on it, as I recall. That's kind of hilarious. Now its electrical that is biting me in the ass. I'm on site here, trying to get this project finished and what's the discipline hounding my every move? Electrical. How do I wire this? What's the signal cable for this. Is this relay open or closed? I can't get away from this.

I wanted to be a structural engineer, and ended up anything but. Such is life I guess.

Toodles!

The provincial election came to Watson this afternoon. My boss was pretty excited, because the party that came to visit our company is the one he's really in favor of. I, on the hand, don't really have much use for their policies. I see a string of bad ideas taking over if they get elected. They won't all be bad, but the general slant I'm seeing from them does not really impress me.

So we all rally at the production shop to show off what we do. It was kind of anti-climactic, to be perfectly honest. The politicians and the media came in, my boss said a few words, and they had some water. I won't say it was a waste, but I really didn't think it was really worth the effort that was expended on it. If I knew that my bosses issues were the issues of this party, I might have cared a little more. The whole thing seemed high on appearance, and low on merit.

So my afternoon was interrupted and I'll probably not get done. I hate that.

Welcome to the weekly report on Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica!

Good episode this week. The highlight? The absolute highlight? That is, without question, Nick and Drew moving furniture. When they set up that aluminum ladder, across from the retaining wall to the second storey balcony? I was just howling! These two idiots used an aluminum ladder to bridge a space between a retaining wall and the side of Nick and Jessica's house, so they could slide what looked like a very heavy cupboard across and into the upstairs bedroom. Oh god that was funny! Unfortunately for my sense of hilarity, the project worked for them and the cupboard survived. But it seemed so precarious while they were moving it.

Nick was decorating the house, while Jessica was in New York doing promotional work for her book. Jessica wrote a book!?! Jessica can write? She actually used the phrase 'clothes trier oner' when she was going through wardrobe for her appearance on TV. You have to wonder about that girl. Also amusing from the wardrobe scene was the editing that ran about 96 comments of 'cute' made my Jessica, and who I believe was her mom. The whole Jessica trip, and the highlights from it, were kind of secondary to the episode. Nick's decorating was the focus of this episode. We saw a few shots from Jessica's trip to New York. There was the wardrobe segment, the booksigning, where she was worried about there being a measly 15 people lined up to get her autograph, the trip to the Today show, and some fluff. For example, Jessica stopped in at a firehall to meet some fireman. Pure cheese. She does look good in T-shirts though. Jessica has some disturbingly appealing breasts. They could do a whole episode on just that. But, showing that the blonde in her hair goes straight to the roots, she actually lost her hotel room, when the number was on the paper in her hand.

Upon returning from the trip, we get to see Nick and Jessica go at it in the most hostile moment we've witnessed so far. Nick seemed pretty hot about Jessica's dislike for his decorating. In truth, she didn't care so much about the actual design choices. The thrust of her argument seemed to be that it wasn't done by a designer. Jessica didn't want to do it herself, but wanted to hire someone to do it. Someone did do it for you! Nick did! I thought her point was infantile and I totally stand on Nick's side on this one. An amusing comment from this interlude was Nick's assertion that Jessica could pay him for his decorating services, if payment for it was the sticking point. Of course his allusion was to some sexual favors, and not monetary recompense.

Again, another enjoyable half with the most amusing newlyweds on TV.

Now playing . . . Johnny Rivers - Secret Agent Man

Now playing . . . MC Miker G & DJ Sven - Holiday Rap

Now Playing . . . Billy Idol - Cradle of Love

Now Playing . . . Guns 'n' Roses - November Rain

Now playing . . . Proclaimers - I'm On My Way

Now playing . . . Hooters - And We Danced

Now playing . . . Melissa Etheridge - I Will Never Be The Same

Now playing . . . Underworld - Born Slippy

Now playing . . . Ice Cube - No Vaseline

Some reflections at the end of an exhausting day.

I got the truck that I want, for the price that I want, under the circumstances I want. My existing truck will be taken on trade at the value needed to make it disappear. I'm ony 4 dollars over my pre-established budget and its got everything I wanted, and a little bit more. I think I won.

The other thing on my mind tonight is, my computer. It makes this strange clicking noise, but only some of the time. I thought it was hard drive but, it doesn't seem connected to hard drive operation. Sometimes its clicking and at others its not. And it will cease the noise for no reason at all. Any thoughts my blog friends?

Now I feel better. Toodles.

I need to get a few things (well two actually) off my chest.

One is a subject that came up last night. Sean tells me this story about a girl he knows. Its kind of messed up in the first place. He meets her under the pretense of a date only to find she has a boyfriend (nearly betrothed). But I digress, back to the story. Sean has a conversation with this girl, and during the course of it she confesses that she's dumped her boyfriend because he cheated on her 5 times, as she just found out. But here's the part that sets my blood to boiling. She wants him back.

What the hell is wrong with people? Five times!?! How do you forgive that? At some point you have to understand that this one is not the one for you. Once maybe you can forgive. Even that isn't fair. Once you can forgive but its probably time to say goodbye. Or maybe not. I don't know. But five times!?!?! How can that possibly be forgiveable? I can understand the desire to not be alone, and the wrenching loss of a long relationship but FIVE TIMES!?!?! That's not commitment honey.

And the other thing on my mind is, coffee breaks. What is it that the bloody world ceases to rotate on its axis when the poorly defined event knows as 'coffee break' occurs? I'm at the production shop this morning and when this annointed event arises, tools drop to the floor and we nearly sprint for the coffee machine. I had about 5 more minutes of discussion I needed to do with the one technician but nope, the world stops for coffee. It has to wait. That just drives me insane!

P.S. The idiot car dealer won't meet my terms on the truck I wanted. I guess I have to go look somewhere else.

This is the point where I'd usually go 'Toodles' but I'm much too depressed to do that.

Its kind of interesting how we get into patterns. I came home to Watson last night. It was a bit of an odd experience. I'm never here on weekend evenings. I haven't driven back to Watson on a weekend evening in so long I don't even remember the last time I did it. Going to bed here on a Sunday? It almost never happens. I almost didn't know what to do with myself. As it was I needed an hour or so to wind down and get my bearings before I could go to bed and sleep.

On the positive side of that however, I'm having a good Monday. No, the work or stress level is not down, but surprisingly I'm in better spirits. I think it was the relaxion I indulged in over the weekend. That was sorely needed.

Thanks for listening. Toodles!

Its time for a rant.

What the hell is the deal with salesmen? I go to a dealership today, to see if I can get another quote on a model of vehicle that I like, to further put into perspective what I'm going to need to pay, to get what I want. So I get this complete idiot. And I don't use that terms lightly. This is his business. Selling cars is what he does. And yet, when it comes time to price out the options that I want (as he didn't have a model in stock that fit my criteria) he doesn't even know how the pricing schemes are set out for the vehicle.

Its like this. If you want leather seats, and all the little extras that are lumped into the leather convenience group, you have to get what is termed the 'SLT' model. That's significant to remember. In essence the SLT represents top of the line. This tool of a salesman tries to tell me that if I want the leather seats I have to get the Envoy XL. The guy is retarded. An XL is a larger version of the standard Envoy that includes a third row of seats. I try, as politely as I can, to explain to this idiot that I don't want an XL, I want an SLT Envoy. He won't come off his assertion that I have to get an XL. All I could do was, shake my head in frustration, watch them make idiots of themselves by being way over budget, and then leave.

Thus my question becomes, shouldn't a salesman actually KNOW these things before he tries to sell me something? I go into the dealership and I end up knowing more about the vehicle in question than he does. That seems wrong to me.

Thanks for listening.

Some interesting things that happened to me today.

The truck leasing thing has run into another roadblock. Basically its come down to the upfront charges that are necessary. Its $2400, rounded loosely. I have a problem. I don't have $2400 cash, and I can't afford the extra in monthly payments rolling that into the total would amount to. So, I will have to find it somewhere. My boss has already stepped up, saying he'll help me, so I feel confident that eventually the deal will get done.

It turns out I was already set up for direct banking. I did not know this. After some fooling around with getting a new password (one that I actually KNEW) I was online and exploring my account. I have money. LOL I can't do much with the power just yet. I need to set up some bills online, so I can do everything from my computer. I think I will like this.

BTW, my telephone assistant with BMO was named Christiane.

Those were the highlights from my day. Sorry they were kinda boring (except the last, neat little coincidence).

Toodles!

Well, I've been crunching numbers on my truck problem this afternoon, and its starting to come into focus. Its looking like a Chevy Trailblazer is going to win. I just need to get in touch with the dealer who's offered me the best price, and nail him down on his numbers.

I won't mention the numbers, as that's not fair to the people I've been in conversation with. It is interesting to see the machine at work, and where the numbers fall out when they give you your lease payment at the bottom. I've learned a thing or two, again, about how they price these units.

I don't know if this is the best way to have handled this vehicle leasing situation but, at the end I have to go with what is the best deal for me. Maybe I try too hard to make everyone happy and I just need to be selfish about this. It ends up being a lot of money. I suppose I deserve to get the best deal for my situation. I still feel a little bad about the back and forth. Oh well. I never told anyone that they made to beat someone else's price. I let them give me their best numbers and left it at that.

I still can't think of a blog question of the day. Sorry.

Toodles.

I'm watching Newlyweds again. I forgot to mention something on the first entry. For some mysterious reason the blurred Jessica's boob!

Here is your weekly synopsis of my favorite show, Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica. It was kind of a clip show this week. There wasn't an overriding theme to this one. The funny moments came in little bits throughout.

Before I get to that, I gotta ask, what the hell must be going through your head if you try to lie to your wife about what you were doing the night before, if there are camera crews following you everywhere? We opened with Jessica going to New York to do promotional work, while Nick was in L.A. They met up in Florida, and he actually tried to tell her he wasn't out partying when she couldn't get him on the phone. Hello, they showed clips during the comversation! Might Jessica not be able to see these? That seemed a little goofy to me.

Jessica is performing at some 4th of July show in Florida, and before she goes on, there is a girl who has a rough time on stage. She can't hit the notes. To contrast this, Jessica goes over the top with "God Bless America'.

Let's see, what else was there? They come home and have to decide what and where to eat. How can it take anyone this long to make up their mind. The restaurant was funny in that the little girl wanted Jessica's autograph but barely acknowledged Nick's presence.

The couple is off to the Bahamas for most of the rest of the show. As you'd expect, much of the hilarity that follows is related to drunken hijinks. I like how Jessica can just put it out there and say, 'I'm drunk'. I respect that.

They are obviously married and in love. We got a few clips of them canoodling one another.

Swimming with the dolphins was interesting. Not so many funny moments, as just amusing. Jessica didn't seem too thrilled to be in the tank with the dolphins but over the course of it, seemed to warm to the experience.

Sadly I can point to any defining moments in this episode. It didn't have any breakout moments. Still good, as always. I eagerly await next week's episode.

I was watching 'Life Or Something Like It' at lunch today. I couldn't stay to the end to check something. I think the movie, or part of it at least, were filmed in Vancouver. The part where Lanie gets her prediction from the homeless guy, I think it was filmed in front of the building where Suncorp, the company I used to work for, had a Vancouver office. It was a distinctive building, and the few glimpses I got of the structure makes me think it was the same one.

On a related note, I don't think Angelina Jolie has very good teeth.

MUPPET NEWS FLASH!!!

The first snow of the season has begun to descend on Watson!

People everywhere are falling into despair. It would be pandemonium if everyone wasn't crushed into such pits of gloom.

More on this story as news breaks.

We have an update on the Jerome situation!

Things look pretty grim for Jerome. In an evenings television entertainment yesterday, I did not notice his presence on my television screen. It seems quite likely that Jerome has passed on to the big screen TV in the sky, no longer around to torment and frustrate me with his presence.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. Jerome had become so much a part of my daily life that he'd almost elevated himself to the level of pet. I actually kind of missed him while I was watching TV last night.

I need help.

Toodles!!!

I know I do this a lot but, I have a question.

Why can't salesman just tell you the whole story? What is it that makes them have to obfuscate everything? Is it just that they're stupid, or do they think they're pulling the wool over my eyes?

I'm investigating this vehicle lease idea. I talked to this guy last week. He knew I wanted a high kilometer lease. So he calls me this morning, and leaves a message on my voice mail. It includes a number for the lease rate of a vehicle that meets my desires. It sounded like a good number. So I called and asked him for some paper work. And this is another thing that pisses me off. Stop jerking me around. I ask for some documentation and already he's in backpedal mode. "Well, well," he goes, "its just like I said." Yeah, I know buddy, so put it in writing. Why can't they just do that?

So he sends me the form with the pricing on it. I examine it closely. It only allows for 24,000 km per year. GROAN!!! I made it clear to this guy that I would need more kilometers than 24,000. If that's all this one lists, its essentially useless to me. I need a number that covers everything.

This is why I hate buying big ticket items. No one wants to give you a price. Its all, 'a little bit from Column A, plus a little bit from Column B." ARRGGGHHHH!!!!

Toodles.

And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts,
And I looked and behold: a pale horse.
And his name, that sat on him, was Death.
And Hell follwed with him.

Friday, October 10, 2003 Blog Question Of The Day:

Why do I change my passwords to incorporate a specific girl, only AFTER I lose her?

Do you have a minute?

What is the deal with SaskTel high speed internet? What did I do to be put in 'The Villas' yet again? I've already lost track of how many times I've had, dropped service, this morning. What the hell is the deal here? Do we get all the 1960's network equipment here in Watson? If more than three people try to access the internet simultaneously, the system crashes and has to reboot? What's going on?

This pisses me off. I pay the same price as a city dweller, for my SaskTel internet connection. Why can't I have the same reliability? Its obvious we have second rate network equipment, or undersized network equipment, here in Watson. Why is that? I suppose I should be happy just to have high speed internet but how useful is it if it drops me every 5 minutes?

That's just my opinion though. I could be wrong.

Its time for a rant.

First of all, I admit, part of this is my fault. I should have blocked this moron. I hate doing that. It seems so mean. But in this case, perhaps it was necessary. I can't deal with this level of stupidity.

So I'm sitting here at my desk, minding my own business, when this person I have occasionally chatted with, pops on and says hi. Okay, that's alright, so I hi back. There's the usual, how are you crap. I do my part. I answer, truthfully, and with more than just, fine. And I inquire about her status. Then it starts.

Oh my life is f%&ked up! So I bite, being the nice person I try to be. What's wrong, I ask. Then I get this list of disasters. In debt, have to go to the hospital, need a new car. And my polite comments saying this is unfortunate is met with, Yeah.

How do you chat with someone that just going 'Yeah' to everything. They're your problems. Either they are interesting to you or talk about something else. But say something. Don't respond to me with 'Yeah' on everything. That just drives me. You type something, and you get back 'yeah'. I end up doing all the chatting and I'm really trying to work, and chat with my other friends. What can I do with 'Yeah'.

ARRGGGHHHH!!!!

That is all. Good day to you.

We have a very important blog question of the day today. This is something that I've wondered about, to myself, on many occasions, and never come up with a decent answer. So, I will turn to you, my faithful blog readers, to get an idea of what you think.

What is the best story about me?

Contact me by the usual methods.

In what is to become a new feature on my blog, we will be reviewing the highlights from this week's episode of Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica.

We had tension provided this week by both Nick, and Jessica's dealings with record executives, regarding their new singles. In a nutshell, both disagreed with the exec's. They both seemed pretty adamant they were right, and I can't argue to the contrary, because in neither instance did the show's producers give us a full clip upon which to render a decision. Since I like these two, I'll err on their side, and say that the record people needed to lighten up.

These events were fairly stressful, and as they were in Cincinnati for Nick's grandmother's wedding, what better idea than to go out partying!?! The partying itself was a pretty boring, 30 second montage of random shots from the night of drinking. Apparently the idea was to show Nick getting hammered. Funny though that the result was that Jessica had a hangover in the morning. Apparently she's a lightweight.

Jessica's condition in the morning brought us the show's funniest moments. Which isn't surprising because Jessica is the life of this show. Nick is just too 'together'. Jessica is a princess and provides nearly all the comic relief. In this scene she cuts forth with a tremendous, 3 second, burp. Jessica Simpson has the best belching talent I have ever witnessed in a female. She deserves an award. And to top off the hilarity she actually uses the phrase, 'drop the kids off at the pool'.

Nick is unimpressed by the quality of sound production at the old folks home. I think he was asking a bit much from a 75 year old guy. Later on his lack of faith in the 75 year old sound guy is re-affirmed when the old guy can't even get the mic on for Nick's song at the wedding ceremony.

Last up is the wedding itself. But first, we have to watch the couple prepare. Nick, the pretty boy that he is, fusses with his hair, to a degree that I think is excessive. Meanwhile, and this provides some subdued humor, Jessica does some ironing of her dress. Call me crazy but it really doesn't look like she knows what she's doing.

And that was it. In the conclusion we see some clips from Jessica's re-recording of her first single off the new album. She goes into the session saying she has a hangover. Is it just me or is Jessica doing a lot of drinking during the course of production of this show? Just an observation.

Again, another excellent episode of Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica. I eagerly await the next episode.

P.S. I hate Jerome

What's the deal with me and new foods?

I've been on this kick lately, of re-trying things that I always was dismissing as food I didn't like. For instance, tonight I had cabbage rolls. Odd, they weren't as offensive as I remembered them to be. Granted, I won't be driving down the road to get them, but the meal itself was not that bad. I did enjoy the buns more than the cabbage rolls. The guy from the U.S. that was also at my bosses for supper didn't even know what a cabbage roll was. That's an awfully weird thing to hear, when they are so ingrained into the culture I grew up in.

On the weekend, my friend Melissa talked me into putting sour cream on my baked potato. I had to admit that it was a pretty darn good idea. I don't really like baked potatoes but the one I had on Sunday was pretty tolerable.

I've had mayonnaise on some sandwiches lately and would have to admit, it was no offensive. I tried pickles too and I have to say, they still don't do anything for me. I will pick them off. I also still don't like mustard. I've tried it on sandwiches and burgers a couple times this year, mostly because i forgot to say, take it off, but I can't get myself to like that. But, again as a result of my friendship with Melissa and Christiane, I've been having subs instead of burgers or other such fast food. (I think those girls have been an excellent influence on me) There's really no point in paying $8.00 for a sandwich, if you're going to leave everything off, all the vegetables and so on, so I've been ordering them with the works. Tomatoes, for instance, is something I've historically said I didn't like. On my sandwich, I really don't mind them.

This brings me back to my question. Why am I suddenly trying all these new foods? I will concede, many of the instances can be traced back to simply being open minded to a friend's suggestion. But why do I now like things that I before didn't like? Do tastes change over time, even if you're not constantly probing and testing them? Can boundaries shift, without any impetus to move them? Its all very curious.

Toodles!

What an up and down day I've had!

There was a big, closed door meeting this morning. I immediately went into panic mode, as I do with anything that is 'hush-hush'. That broke up about 10:30 and I moved into Murray's office, as I had a variety of things that needed his attention. Keep in mind I'm still churning my guts. We talk about projects and related stuff until noon and Murray calls a break for lunch. In passing, as we leave, he mentions that his earlier meeting involved me. This did nothing for my panic and I had what could accurately be described as a 'panic attack' for the entire lunch hour.

So back we come after lunch and resume the previously suspended meeting. Murray brings up what he'd discussed in his earlier meeting and while about me, was not even remotely close to what I'd managed to dream up. The guys in the shop were just frustrated by the drawings they had to work with, in constructing all these units we're doing. Murray and I batted that one around for awhile, and I explained where I was coming from, the strides I had in mind for future action, and how I would welcome some feedback from the guys doing the actual building. It sounds like this is getting transmitted so I think that was resolved.

Bouyed by the success of having my dire fears reputed, I strove forward with an issue that had been plaguing my mind since last week. And to my enormous relief my boss was ameniable to the solution I proposed to alleviate my stress, where my vehicle is concerned. I think that situation will be coming to an adequate resolution pretty soon.

So I went through some gyrations today but it ended in a good place. I feel reasonably satisfied. I look forward to the evening.

Toodles!

Tuesday's blog question of the day. (its a thought provoking one)

Do you think that humanity will colonize another planet (or moon, cellestial body of some kind) in your lifetime?

Well that helped!

Its been a, trying, morning. I won't go into it because its the same story, just with different players. Too many people, asking too many questions, most of which have answers that they already have, if they'd take the time to examine the situation. That wonderful burn of stress in the gut was sure evident. I could definitely use the punching bag I'm thinking of buying.

But I went home at lunch and watched Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica. That show is hilarious. Today we had Jessica sulking because Nick was going to be interviewed on Playboy Radio, and then attend a party at the Playboy mansion. The girl is blonde, busty and beautiful and still she worries. I don't quite follow how that happens but that's probably a blind spot on my part. Then they went golfing. That was uproarious. ever second thing Jessica had to say was, I have to pee. They're on the driving range, and just as Nick is about to swing, Jessica say, I gotta pee. Needless to say he shanked it. I believe that was when he fired his driver into the bush.

Which brings us to the blog question of the day.

Do you think Jessica Simpson's boobs are real?

You know what to do. Toodles.

Its official. Sean's good friend 'Murphy' has changed addresses. He is now residing with me, riding shotgun in the truck that's not driving anymore.

I blew a rear differential bearing. Some of you might now what that is but I'd never heard of it until this morning. To fix that, and the other sundry stuff they found under the hood, will cost me about $1500. I'm not too impressed. I didn't need this, right now. I've kind of mortgaged myself heavily with commitments recently, and I needed stuff to hang together until January. That fell apart in spectacular fashion yesterday. You really can't ignore a metallic grinding noise from the rear end of your vehicle.

So, today's blog question of the day is:

Should I trade in my truck for a lease on something new?

Email is as usual. Later folks.

This will be a short blog entry because, while I have lots that I could say, I haven't the enthusiasm to spend the time typing it.

There is something wrong with my truck. A squeaky noise coming from the rear of the vehicle, that I'd identified before, has magnified into something very ugly, and ominious sounding. It was too late for service today, but I'll be up early in the morning, bending over to take the news. I'm praying silently, but like the Pope, the outcome does not look promising.

Good luck to all of you with your coming days.

Block question of the day for Tuesday, September 30th:

What are the top three things on your Christmas list this year?

I am not happy.

I'm sick. Well, not yet, but I'm getting there. I woke up with a scratchy throat. That is the precursor of a cold, for me. I expect I will get progressively worse through the course of the day and when I wake up tomorrow morning, I'll be in hell. I hate when it builds up like this. Having a cold to look forward to is not something I appreciate.

Consequently, I had a bad night's sleep. I didn't really think about it until I got up and saw the mess I'd made of my sheets overnight. In retrospect I realize I woke up several times last night, which I suspect is another symptom of my burgeoning sickness. I really didn't need this. A 7 plus hour drive with a growing cold does not sound like fun.

I think I'm going to wrap up this blog entry and slink away to a quiet place here at my desk where I don't have to think much. Here's to hoping you all feel better than me.

Toodles.

Monday's blog question of the day.

What thing have you accomplished that has made you the most proud? What have you done that has made someone else feel the most pride in you?

I have good news! For all of you who emailed me about it, the chicken cup was back in the cupboard this morning. My hot chocolate tastes WAY better because of it. :-D

I have a question.

I like to buy my gas at Mohawk stations whenever possible. For one reason, I can show my CAA card and have the purchase count towards a discount on my yearly membership. With all the travelling I've been doing for work, this is going to add up to a healthy sum, and my CAA membership, when it comes due in December, should be much reduced from its full price. However, the second reason, and I consider it the more important, is that I can get mid grade gasoline, that has ethanol added, at the same price as regular.

Now what I want to know is, why would anyone still get the regular gas, if you can get the better octane, and more clean burning ethanol added gasoline, for the exact same price. I pulled up to the pumps last week, and there was one person there. He was at the regular pump when the mid-grade pump was available. Why? Its like turning down the second item on buy 1 get 1 free. Does anyone have an explanation for this?

Toodles!

I don't know if I'm really 'supposed' to be doing this BUT hello to you all from the Blades game. Apparently there is wireless access in Saskatchewan Place. :-D

Toodles!!!=

A sausage and an egg were being fried in a frying pan.

The egg said to the sausage, "don't you think its hot in here?"

The sausage said, "God damn! A talking egg!"

What a slow news day it has been so far. I tried, with no success, to write a blog entry three times this morning. I had nothing to say. My motivation for work has been low. I blame a lack of sleep. I woke up for the first time about 3:30 this morning and didn't sleep solidly again after that. Still have a low grade headache that while I can feel, isn't bothering me that much. Picked away at a task this morning and found I'd done most of the work already. All that is needed is to put together the final document.

One piece of noteworthy news was the strange dream I had last night. I dreamed I was on campus at the U of S. I have forgotten the specifics of why I was there, but the part of the dream I remember had me walking through the 'bowl' on campus. Somehow this rolled together with doing a Sask. Place shift, and I discovered myself sitting on the grass and the narrow end of the bowl, between the library and the geology building, trying to balance a cash tray for an event. I had my money, and my count, and I was trying to reconcile the numbers on my PDA. My calculation of the number of beer I'd sold was not making sense to me. I think it was something like 13x24 and I was getting a number like 724. Suffice it to say it wasn't making sense. People kept coming up and bothering me, because it was taking me so long to figure out this deposit. Eventually I just threw up my hands and crunched my brain to figure everything out in my head. It was right about then that I woke up and it was 3:30.

Hopefully you, my faithful readers, had a better sleep than I. I wish you another one tonight. Toodles!

Another tidbit of news from an enormously hectic day.

An old friend messaged me on MSN today. My buddy Darren from my days at March Consulting said a hello to me this afternoon. That was a nice, and welcome surprise. I hadn't heard from him in some time. It was good to catch up, even if it was only for a few minutes. He has a baby now (well, he's one and a half actually) so Darren was babysitting and duty called. Still it was good to say a hello to an old friend. Hopefully he will make it online again in the future.

Toodles!

Bloq question of the day.

Why am I blessed with having high speed internet out here in the hinterlands of Saskatchwan, but similarly cursed by having the connection be so unstable during the day?

The 10:30 Blog question.

Why does my keyboard stop working when I plug my digital camera into my USB hub?

On Kevin's suggestion I decided to have a hot chocolate this morning. The only problem with this plan was, some dirty so-and-so has taken my favorte chicken cup. Its just not the same without the chicken cup.

This has been your 9:00 news break.

Do you know what I hate? It really frustrates me when I wake up early in the morning, for instance 5:30 like I did this morning. The waking up isn't the frustrating part. That can actually be nice because you look at the clock and realize, oh good, I can go back to sleep for a couple hours. The part I hate is when you wake up early, but its that sudden, jolting awakeness, and you get the adrenaline rush of, oh crap, I slept in and I'm late for work! Then you look at the clock and its 5:30 and you can go back to sleep. Trouble is, the adrenaline rush has made you wide awake, and going back to sleep is nearly impossible.

This has been your 8:30 rant. Toodles!

I just remembered the other thing I wanted to add to my blog for today. Funny how you always forget at that point where you have to remember it. This can double as the 'Blog Question of the Day'.

Does anyone know how to add a hit counter to a blog hosted on Blogspot?

What a weird day its been. First of all, I couldn't log onto the Blogger site all afternoon. I tried three times and each one its errored and wouldn't load my TELK page. Oh well, I'll blog as I wait for my supper to defrost.

Today was frustrating at work. More of the usual nightmare; dealing with consultants. Why is it they have to be obtuse? I was sorting out all the conflicting design decisions, and mis-specified equipment. Wrong tags on things, missing tags, incorrectly placed equipment. On top of the fact that all the analytical equipment is just plain wrong for the application. This stuff we have to use is all wrong for a small scale membrane treatment unit. There are some mistakes on our part too. Some equipment was located in the wrong place on the unit, some equipment was not ordered, and its all combining for one big headache. I'll be working on it again tomorrow. I hope I can put the majority of it to rest by the end of Thursday.

There is some good news however. I'm looking good for completing payment on my big screen TV. I ran some numbers this evening, after paying a couple of bills, and the money should be there to cover that very large expenditure. That gave me a nice, happy, warm feeling. I had a brief panic attack when i forget to add my next paycheque to the numbers. It all looks good and I think I can relax.

That's all from here. Have a good one folks.

Toodles.

MUPPET NEWS FLASH!!!

I have secured vacation time for the new year. The situation came to a head this morning and I had to do something. So, I went ahead and asked Murray for two weeks off in the early new year. He said 'okay' without hesitation.

So, to summarize, I will be going on vacation, to the Mayan Riviera, in Mexico, for the week of January 9-16. I have not figured out how to pay for this yet but with luck, something will work itself out.

I will also be at the Nokia Brier, in Saskatoon, from March 6-14. This event is important to me because I missed out on most of it the last time it was here. I just see it as an experience to be part of the crew that pulls off this show. I'm looking forward to this.

Thanks for listening. Toodles to all!

News from my house this evening.

It appears Jerome has a friend. I had two flies up on the screen this evening. I need to spray some RAID in there or something, to get rid of them. Damn pesky flies!!!

Toodles.

Today's blog survery question.

Should there be a TELK fan club?

You know what to do.

Another couple of examples from the list of, things that piss me off. They are from Microsoft products, which should come as a surprise to no one.

Why does Microsoft default the margins in Word to 1.25"? How picked that as a standard? Maybe its is a standard somewhere, and I'm just not up on typesetting but it seems to me that 1" would be a much better standard. I've asked the question of people and I hear the same complaint. G&D D#$M Microsoft, makes me change the margins every time!!! If someone could explain this to me, I'd sure appreciate it.

What is wrong with Word in that, I can have the whole document at one font size, lets say 14 point. I copy a section, from the same document, to another place in, the same document, and when it pastes, its a different font size. Why does it do that? They build all these 'smart' features into the program, and it can't even do that right?

Just some stuff on my mind. Toodles again!

Monday morning has arrived and I have a few points to comment on. As none of the following information is really paragraph worthy, I will summarize in short.

I guess winter will soon be here. I got up this morning and drove back to Watson. The truck thermometer showed -2 at one point. Its cold. BRRRRRR

Thanks to Sean for writing a blog entry. It was nice to hear what's been happening on the farm. It was further nice to read a perspective that was rural, and not urban.

I hate the race track. Its dirty, ugly, and dilapidated. I also have issue with the amount of alcohol consumed during the racing event. Its 10 degrees out, why are you morons drinking COLD beer!?! Sometimes I just don't understand people.

This is the worst time of year to drive, for me. On Friday nights driving into Saskatoon its right into the sun, and Monday mornings when I come back to Watson its again into the sun. I need a Darth Vader mask.

These are my points for the morning. Check back with me later for more hilarity. Toodles!

I miss Sean. Its kind of depressing to constantly check his blog and never see an entry.

Okay people, its time for a rant.

Do you know what pisses me off? These people that come on the internet to chat, but then forget who they're talking to. That really gets on my nerves. You'll be having a conversation with them, and after 3 minutes they'll say, who is this? Who is this!?! You started talking to me? Why the hell do I have to explain myself to you now!?! Or, and this is maybe even worse, they ask you the 'who are you' question, and then proceed to ask you a series of questions, basic ones, that they've already asked you once before. Are you that scatterbrained that you can't remember a few basic facts? Am I alone here? Is this a deep, dank forest to which I alone know the path through!?!

ARRGGGHHHH!!!!!

Just something that was on my mind. Toodles.

The shifting sands of life, and love, can be mournfully depressing.

Its hard when the feelings that once existed, are now dissipated. You're left with what you feel remaining, but its sad and withered, faded by the passage of too much time. The emotion is still there, in all its intensity. But a chasm exists between what is, and what was. The situation is not the same as when it bloomed. You look across this void and see what you did. But you see the shadow cast, and not the image you desire. That which you desire has passed on to some other state of existence, where you will only touch it in the briefest of moments.

Maybe it can be re-captured. Perhaps feelings that once burned bright as the sun, can re-ignite in a moment that seems to be missing something integral. But it can feel like you have to re-learn truths that used to be simple. Moments that had been accepted as gospel, are now noted as remarkable. How can something that was perfect, fall back into question?

Life changes, it evolves, it makes new things from the old. Perhaps that's all that I've seen. The new that will grow, may be better than the old I lament. I wish it to be true.

Here I shall remain.

I've found my show! This is freakin' hilarious!

I'm watching 'Newlyweds: Jessica and Nick' This is so much fun. Normally I don't like reality shows but I can't help but laugh at this. I dunno how much is real and how much is acting but who cares.

Jessica buys lingerie and doesn't look at the bill until she leaves and its $750. So what does she do? She calls Nick.

They blur a dancer's ass.

They bleep the word 'dick'.

Jessica almost cries, numerous times, as she watches the sexy dancers cavort around her husband.

She is such a priss, and so painfully insecure. I gotta wonder if some of it is playing for the cameras because its so obvious. But what is with the bleeping and the blurs. You can't be rude on MTV? When the hell did that start!?!

You know what I hate about having multiple computers? When I'm logged into MSN on one, and then when I turn on another one, it logs me in there, and logs me off where I wanna be. It happened at lunch. I turn the 'Out To Lunch' flag on my MSN when I leave because I watch cartoons at lunch at home. But I had to email myself something, so I turned my computer on at home. Opening Outlook Express automatically fires up MSN. I tried to cancel it ahead of time but it didn't work, and it logged me out at work. I didn't log in at home, because I cancelled it. In the meantime Tara had messaged me on MSN.

I hate when it does that. I seem like I'm being rude when its just coincidence. I hope nobody thinks I'm ignoring them when something like that happens.

Toodles everyone!

WARNING!!! If you have a weak stomach you may not want to read the following blog entry. WARNING!!!

Grant's Cast Removal

It started well. Showed up, on time. Forgot my extra sock and shoe so I had to go back to the truck and get it. The temperature is a little too chilly to be barefooting it across the parking lot. I was the only one in the waiting room so I got in almost right away. It was only 10 minutes from when I showed up until I saw the doctor. A few minutes of chit chat; 'how's have you been', 'any pain', etc. Everything was good so it was cast removal time!!!

Had a really good nurse for the cast removal. It was obvious she'd done this many times before because she had a procedure and knew exactly what she wanted to do. First she opened the cast along the inside, coming from the foot to the ankle, and then from the knee to the ankle. She had some trouble on this side with the cast material right at the ankle. It didn't want to cut all the through. But the nurse was very thorough and this was eventually remedied. Then she moved to the other side, and made a similar set of slices on the outside of the cast. With much less difficulty she opened this side, and now my foot was no longer encased.

I'd caught a whiff of it, from time to time, over the past week or two. I knew it wasn't going to be pretty when we got inside. The nurse took some scissors and cut the guaze material that lay between my skin, and the fibreglass wrap material. One blast of it hit me when she got to the ankle, as she cut from my toes. I braced myself, and she must have too, because she didn't flinch as she cut the guaze. As the last slice was made she put away the scissors and pried the cast apart. My foot was free! I gingerly pulled it from the material that had surrounded me almost continuously for the last 7 weeks.

It was awful! Truly heinous. I knew it would be but even that didn't prepare me from what I saw. And smelled. The smell wasn't as overpowering as I expected. It was the same lingering thing I'd gotten a whiff off for a couple of weeks. But it was bad. As I attempted to pull my foot from the cast material, the gauze stuck to my skin. Not that weak, clingy feeling of a wet sock, but the bound on, glued to the surface feeling of pulling away melted plastic. It actually came loose with an audible smack. Like I've already said, the odor was offensive. It wasn't as powerful as I suspected, but the odor was distinct, and vicious. I can't even put a description to it, because it was bad in a way I've been unable to properly decide for myself. Can you remember in your head that smell you get in the theatre, with the popcorn and the little trays of nachos. How it smells hot, and richly inviting? Well imagine that smell again, but consider the heat was making it smell bad, and not good. That's an approximation of what this is like.

So she pulls the cast away, as the last of my skin becomes unglued to the gauze. I get a brief look at the inside of the cast and the view is nauseating. The inside of the cast, around my foot and up past the ankle, is all brownish-orange with stale perspiration. It looks like ear wax, spread literally along the inside of the gauze. It was sickening to look at. I turned my eyes away from the cast, and aimed them at the foot. I was looking for evidence of this same orange buildup on my skin. I couldn't see it there, which was a blessing. I assume it must have come off with the bonding of my foot to gauze.

I stepped down on the floor and walked around. It felt oddly peculiar. It was like my foot was on air. I couldn't really feel the ground under my toes. It felt similar to when your foot is asleep, but without the heavy, leaden sensation that goes along with that. Rather it was the opposite, a feeling of extreme lightness. I walked around in a few circles, trying to get used to the feeling. It didn't go away, but lingered. I also noticed the stiffness in my Achilles tendon, and around my ankle. Lack of mobility had made me stiff, and there was some discomfort but nothing I'd call pain. Rather, the whole sensation was one of relief.

The nurse prepared some wash facilities for me, and I bathed my foot. I was again brought witness to the ugliness that had grown beneath the fibreglass. As I swabbed my foot with the milk white cloth, it came away from my skin with ugly stains of orange, yellow and brown. I frequently had to rinse the terry cloth so that I didn't embarass myself with the ugly stains I was leaving behind. Soap helped, and the warm water felt good. After many minutes of scrubbing, I actually felt relatively clean.

As I completed my scrubbing, and went for another couple circles of the floor, the doctor came in. He examined my foot, and pressured various points. Nothing was painful. I was given the go ahead. With a shake of his hand, my broken foot experience was over, and I exited the building, laughter in my heart.

Toodles!