Today I Learned . . .

1. Don't drive the highway leaving Las Vegas on a Sunday

The Daily Affirmation

1. I found my magnetic name tag

2. Managed to run my Yahoo drafts on my phone, which has never worked before

3. In my absence, my ball hockey team dismantled the opposition to move on to the final of winter league C division

4. The Leafs won their first game under their new coach

Blog Question(s) Of The Day:

1. Why is there no more McGriddle at McDonalds?

2. Should I buy a Brier vest?

3. Why can't Brian Burke tie his tie??

4. Can cheese still go bad, even if you freeze it?

Today I Learned . . .

1. The most important thing is just to have someone notice you.

Blog Question(s) Of The Day:

1. Should I completely customize my iPhone app layout, instead of just alphabetical?

2. Why are all these random people following me?

3. Do I really want to fill out the APEGS salary survey again, for 2012?

4. Should I believe the BMI scale when it says I'm 'overweight'?

The Daily Affirmation:

1. Three completely random people started following me on Twitter overnight

2. In real life, a completely random, but utterly gorgeous woman gave me a compliment.

Today I Learned . . .

1. Due to the low carbon content of stainless steel it can not be hardened. The process of hardening is required to increase strength in steel. The inability to harden stainless steel means it can not be rated Grade 5 or higher, for strength.

Blog Question Of The Day:

1. Should I get another pet?

2. Should I decorate my office with Montreal Expos collectibles?

3. When did I become so incompetent at completing mechanical tasks?

The Daily Affirmation:

1. My Yahoo baseball draft team was sent to me overnight

2. We set up the test skid to check for leaks and repairs and there were no leaks, and no repairs to make

3. My ham sandwich on a cheese bun was beyond phenomenal

4. There are few things better than a jumbo Costco chocolate muffin

5. I bought new shoes today.

6. Using only the raw power of my brain, I was able to remember all of the things I was going to buy at the dollar store (unfortunately they didn't have any stock on one of my items)

I don't understand how some people operate an automobile.

I'm stopped at the light, where Idylwyld Drive merges into 51st Street/Ave C (whatever you want to call that mess of an interchange). I'm second in line on the left. This is a relatively long light for waiting, since the majority of the traffic is on 51st Street/Ave. C. That gets the bulk of the light cycle.

Now its not that uncommon for people to start rolling at a red light. I get that. But we're not even halfway through the wait and this mini-van ahead of me starts rolling. Consequently I begin rolling my eyes. Of course you can only roll so far, when you start doing it that early, before you're in 'oh shit' territory and you have to jam the brakes again. This guy got his nose into traffic he started so early.

Now comes the stupid part.

The car NEXT to him, upon seeing the mini-van start rolling, well he starts rolling too. So their both inching into the intersection, and its no where NEAR the point where its going to turn. Not even close. The mini-van eventually had to give up on the dream and jam the brakes. The guy in the car won't give up. Its like he's committed now, and there's no turning back. This guy is fully into the oncoming lane, and he's STILL inching forward. The light is NOT gonna turn for him.

Well he's screwed now. He's THAT far into the oncoming lane. I can see him, and he's got this, "I'm an idiot but I can't look like an idiot" visage on his face. The guy is looking to the left, trying to gauge whether to stop there, back up or just go for it.

The light is STILL not changing.

By some miracle of fortuity, there's no oncoming traffic. Of course, there's also no imminent sign that the bloody light is gonna change. He's gone so far now that he can't back away. He just steps on it and blows the light with a left turn. Amazingly this prompts the mini-van to start inching again. Keep in mind the light is STILL not changing. The car is all the way around the left turn, and now the mini-van is half into the oncoming lane. This is when the light turns green.

The most idiotic part of this ridiculous tale? I'm second in line behind the mini-van and I still caught the guy in the car before he reached the second light on 51st Street.

I wanted you to know
That I am ready to go, heartbeat
My heartbeat
I wanted you to know
Whenever you are around, can't speak
I can't speak

I wanted you to know
That I am ready to go, heartbeat
My heartbeat
I wanted you to know
Whenever you are around, can't speak
I can't speak

I know what your boy like
Skinny tie and a cuff tight
He go and make breakfast
You walk around naked
I might just text you
Turn your phone over, when it's all over
No settling down, my text go to your screen
You know better than that
I come around when you least expect me
I'm sitting at the bar when your glass is empty
You thinking that this song's coming on to tempt me
I need to be alone like the way you left me
You start calling, you start crying
I come over, I'm inside you
I can't find you
The girl that I once had
But the sex that we have isn't half bad
The text say that "It's not fair"
That's code for "He's not here"
And I'm-a flirt with this new girl
And I'm-a call if it don't work
So we fuck till we come to conclusions
All the things that we thought we was losing
I'm ghost and you know this
That's why we broke up in the first place
Cause

I wanted you to know
That I am ready to go, heartbeat
My heartbeat
I wanted you to know
Whenever you are around, can't speak
I can't speak

I wanted you to know
That I am ready to go, heartbeat
My heartbeat
I wanted you to know
Whenever you are around, can't speak
I can't speak

It's late night Thursday
I know that you heard me
But you don't want the same thing
Well two can play that game
So I'm chilling with my girlfriend
But she not my real girlfriend
She got a key to my place but
She's not my real girlfriend
Stupid, so dummy
Say the wrong thing and wrong girls come runnin'
I'm paranoid that these girls want something from me
And it's hard to make a dime go one hundred
And my dude freakin' out over a worse fate
She on time, but she late for they first date
Cause he went and tried out all new condoms
Slipped off in a threesome, good problems?
Right? Wrong
Askin' him if she gonna play games
We the super smash brothers, but none of them you
I miss the sex when you kiss whenever you through
Sixty-nine is the only dinner for two
I was wrong, but would you have listened to you?
Uh, you were crazy
I got a heart, but the artichoke
Is the only thing girls want when you in that smoke and light

I wanted you to know
That I am ready to go, heartbeat
My heartbeat
I wanted you to know
Whenever you are around, can't speak
I can't speak

I wanted you to know
That I am ready to go, heartbeat
My heartbeat
I wanted you to know
Whenever you are around, can't speak
I can't speak

So we're done? This the real shit?
We used to hold hands like field trips
I'm a jerk, but your dude is a real dick
I read his post on your wall and I feel sick
He ain't cool, he ball and all that
But he just a fake nigga who blog in all caps
You couldn't wait to date
I'm going straight for your thighs like the cake you ate
I give a fuck about the niggas that you say you ate
You know that I’m the best when I’m a-fake-tionate
I'm the best that you had, face it
J and Keyshia are related: racist
I give you money, then you burn me, then you made off
She ain't a killer, but she'd fucking blow your head off
I know he wondering, "What the fuck you hiding?"
That we dated like raps about Bin Laden
Ayo, fuck this
Are we dating? Are we fucking?
Are we best friends? Are we something in between that?
I wish we never fucked, and I mean that

But not really, you say the nastiest shit in bed and it’s fuckin’ awesome

Today I Learned . . .

1. There are the same number of calories in 1 cup of Froot Loops as there are in 1 cup of Cheerios. [CORRECTION: they actually rig the serving sizes to make it appear that they are the same]

2. Stainless steel gains its corrosion resistance from the formation of an invisibly thin, but tenacious layer of chromium oxide formed on the surface of the metal when exposed to oxygen.

The Daily Affirmation:

1. Reviewing the Brier schedule, I will be available to play ball hockey playoffs on Saturday!

2. If we win on Saturday, I think I could squeak in playing in the finals on the following Sunday too!

Blog Question Of The Day:

1. Should I frame my periodic table of elements?

2. Should I do the experiment of trying to live exclusively on granola bars and Coca-Cola?

The Daily Affirmation:

1. Mspa is going to send me a new spa pool body on warranty.

Blog Question Of The Day:

1. Would it be inappropriate to wear a skidoo suit in my office?

2. Should I post my short stories on my blog?

3. Why am I always cold, and so sluggish, in the morning?

The Daily Affirmation:

1. I was very impressed with my effort level at work today.

Blog Question Of The Day:

1. What type of saw do I need to own to cut a perfectly straight edge on a piece of wood?

2. Is there an easy way to scan pages out of a bound book?

The Daily Affirmation:

1. Just came up with a unique solution to my basement storage problem

2. The Shockers played a defensive game that is the stuff of legend tonight, holding a monumentally better team to a 1-1 tie in regulation, before succumbing in a shoot-out

Blog Question Of The Day:

1. Weigh myself upon getting up. Exercise for 30 minutes, drink/eat nothing; sweat minimally. Weight myself after exercising; weight 4 pounds less. Which one is correct?

2. Should I scan all my university notes to PDF and then throw out all the paper/binders?

3. Is there a device you can buy which takes your pulse?