Saturday, February 13, 2010
Tuesday, February 09, 2010
Thus begins the tale of my red mittens . . .
I got an email from The Hudson Bay Company last week. I don't remember the exact text anymore but it was something to the effect of:
"Support your Olympic athletes! Go to Zellers and buy a pair of red Olympic mittens! Now only $10!"
It seemed like a good pitch to me. I like to be patriotic, Zellers is close to my house and $10 seemed like a good deal for mittens. I wasn't entirely convinced however so I thought I'd better consult my sister.
She said it was a good idea.
Thus began my quest for red mittens.
The weekend didn't go so well, with a headache crippling me on Saturday, and my Sunday consumed by a massive drafting project, and then the Super Bowl in the late afternoon to evening. Suffice it to say, there was no time for red mittens.
So Monday was my first real attempt to acquire my prized possession, the Olympic red mittens. However Monday did not follow my original plan either. When I left for work my windshield wiper went flying off. I needed a replacement, which had to come from Costco (accursed place) so it would match the one that stayed on. Long story short, I didn't drive for home until 6:00.
Unbeknownst to me, but apparently knownst to Zellers employees, the store now closes at 6:00 on Monday's and Tuesday's. Who's idea was that, and why wasn't I notified? Regardless of the specifics of the decision, the Olympic gear was on the north side of the door, and i was on the south, and a lock was preventing one from meeting the other.
So the goal of acquiring red Olympic mittens was delayed yet another day.
I knew what I was up against so I left work at 5:00 today, so I'd have ample time to shop for my mittens. I even got a good parking spot in front of Zellers so the walk through the wind chill was minor. The doors opened before me, and within seconds I was in the Olympic apparel section of Zellers, which was conveniently right in front of the door.
What was not conveniently in the Olympic apparel section of the Lawson Heights Zellers were any god damn red Olympic mittens! So a quest that had been consuming me for 5 days will continue on further. I am left with only one question.
Where can I find some red Olympic mittens!?!
I got an email from The Hudson Bay Company last week. I don't remember the exact text anymore but it was something to the effect of:
"Support your Olympic athletes! Go to Zellers and buy a pair of red Olympic mittens! Now only $10!"
It seemed like a good pitch to me. I like to be patriotic, Zellers is close to my house and $10 seemed like a good deal for mittens. I wasn't entirely convinced however so I thought I'd better consult my sister.
She said it was a good idea.
Thus began my quest for red mittens.
The weekend didn't go so well, with a headache crippling me on Saturday, and my Sunday consumed by a massive drafting project, and then the Super Bowl in the late afternoon to evening. Suffice it to say, there was no time for red mittens.
So Monday was my first real attempt to acquire my prized possession, the Olympic red mittens. However Monday did not follow my original plan either. When I left for work my windshield wiper went flying off. I needed a replacement, which had to come from Costco (accursed place) so it would match the one that stayed on. Long story short, I didn't drive for home until 6:00.
Unbeknownst to me, but apparently knownst to Zellers employees, the store now closes at 6:00 on Monday's and Tuesday's. Who's idea was that, and why wasn't I notified? Regardless of the specifics of the decision, the Olympic gear was on the north side of the door, and i was on the south, and a lock was preventing one from meeting the other.
So the goal of acquiring red Olympic mittens was delayed yet another day.
I knew what I was up against so I left work at 5:00 today, so I'd have ample time to shop for my mittens. I even got a good parking spot in front of Zellers so the walk through the wind chill was minor. The doors opened before me, and within seconds I was in the Olympic apparel section of Zellers, which was conveniently right in front of the door.
What was not conveniently in the Olympic apparel section of the Lawson Heights Zellers were any god damn red Olympic mittens! So a quest that had been consuming me for 5 days will continue on further. I am left with only one question.
Where can I find some red Olympic mittens!?!
Tuesday, February 02, 2010
This is an honest, from the heart statement I am about to make. Even though I'm sure it will sound like a joke. (something for which this blog is well renowned)
If anyone can get a message to Erin Carmody of Team PEI, please tell her that I am willing to marry her, despite having never met in person.
If anyone can get a message to Erin Carmody of Team PEI, please tell her that I am willing to marry her, despite having never met in person.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
A few reflections on humanity after visiting Xel'Ha today:
Its really no wonder that the rest of the world has little use for white people. We are, in the greater preponderance of numbers, a race of: fat, stupid, lazy, ignorant bastards who will ignore nearly every rule and cultural nicety, and generally take a big dump on something that is pure, and beautiful.
If you are at ALL uncertain about whether you should be wearing a thong/bikini can you PLEASE ask someone who's opinion you value and trust about wearing it in public, before going out? I think I almost went blind seeing that.
And this one goes out to the particularly vain white women out there:
If you really think that breast implants are going to significantly enhance your appearance, can you at least have the common, god damn decency to wear a bikini that hides the bloody scars from surgery!?!
Its really no wonder that the rest of the world has little use for white people. We are, in the greater preponderance of numbers, a race of: fat, stupid, lazy, ignorant bastards who will ignore nearly every rule and cultural nicety, and generally take a big dump on something that is pure, and beautiful.
If you are at ALL uncertain about whether you should be wearing a thong/bikini can you PLEASE ask someone who's opinion you value and trust about wearing it in public, before going out? I think I almost went blind seeing that.
And this one goes out to the particularly vain white women out there:
If you really think that breast implants are going to significantly enhance your appearance, can you at least have the common, god damn decency to wear a bikini that hides the bloody scars from surgery!?!
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Monday, January 04, 2010
Sunday, January 03, 2010
I have an idea . . .
Why don't we stop in the narrowest part of the upper concourse, where the width available is approximately 6 feet, and it has the happy coincidence of being right in front of the elevator? Why don't we just stop and have a completely banal conversation about absolutely NOTHING!!!!
Doesn't that sound like a good, god damn idea!?!
Why don't we stop in the narrowest part of the upper concourse, where the width available is approximately 6 feet, and it has the happy coincidence of being right in front of the elevator? Why don't we just stop and have a completely banal conversation about absolutely NOTHING!!!!
Doesn't that sound like a good, god damn idea!?!
Saturday, January 02, 2010
So I go to bed tonight, feeling rather sleepy. I've got absent thoughts on my mind but nothing of much consequence. I look at the clock when I decide its time to retire and it spoke back to me that it was 12:48 AM. That seems like a reasonable time to call it a night.
So I'm lying in bed, just thinking casual thoughts. To think of anything more than that would just keep me awake, and that is not my goal on this evening.
But I keep hearing this sound. And I'm not going to pretend that it sounded like anything else. It sounded like someone's boot crunching in the show.
At one point I hear this loud thump, and it really seems like the foundations of my house have been rumbled, by something strong, and deep and powerful. One of those moments like when a garbage truck rumbles down the street, or a snow plow pushes a big load of snow into a pile formed on something hard and concrete.
This sound just keeps going on and on. A few crunches of snow, or so it seems and then silence again. Crunch, crunch, crunch and then nothing. In my paranoia and my anxiety I become convinced that someone is stumbling around the front of my house, trying to decide the best way to break in.
Do I get up and put my fears to rest? Do I dismiss the thoughts as foolish and try to get to sleep?
Crunch, crunch, crunch.
Finally I can no longer take it. Plus I had to go to the bathroom now. I get up. I go downstairs to the living room window and look for this snow crunching assailant that has ruined my night's sleep.
The time on the clock at my disposal reads a cool, crisp 1:21 AM. At first I see nothing, but that's because I'm looking in the bushes in front of my house, and there was never anyone there.
No, what has kept me up for going on towards 45 minutes now, is some ASSHOLE shovelling his bloody, god damn driveway at 1:30 in the blasted morning!!!
So I'm lying in bed, just thinking casual thoughts. To think of anything more than that would just keep me awake, and that is not my goal on this evening.
But I keep hearing this sound. And I'm not going to pretend that it sounded like anything else. It sounded like someone's boot crunching in the show.
At one point I hear this loud thump, and it really seems like the foundations of my house have been rumbled, by something strong, and deep and powerful. One of those moments like when a garbage truck rumbles down the street, or a snow plow pushes a big load of snow into a pile formed on something hard and concrete.
This sound just keeps going on and on. A few crunches of snow, or so it seems and then silence again. Crunch, crunch, crunch and then nothing. In my paranoia and my anxiety I become convinced that someone is stumbling around the front of my house, trying to decide the best way to break in.
Do I get up and put my fears to rest? Do I dismiss the thoughts as foolish and try to get to sleep?
Crunch, crunch, crunch.
Finally I can no longer take it. Plus I had to go to the bathroom now. I get up. I go downstairs to the living room window and look for this snow crunching assailant that has ruined my night's sleep.
The time on the clock at my disposal reads a cool, crisp 1:21 AM. At first I see nothing, but that's because I'm looking in the bushes in front of my house, and there was never anyone there.
No, what has kept me up for going on towards 45 minutes now, is some ASSHOLE shovelling his bloody, god damn driveway at 1:30 in the blasted morning!!!
Friday, January 01, 2010
As I was driving away from the arena tonight, after Team Canada beat the Americans in over-time, and we all busted our asses to serve the crowd, I realized how I could have made a boat load of money.
There were 15,000+ people in that building tonight. Nearly all of them will have gotten to the game in a car. Those cars were spread across probably 100 acres, with temporary lots dotting the landscape all around.
As I was sitting, waiting for my frozen thunder-truck to reach some semblance of heated, I took note of the outside air temperature. It was being reported to me as -31 C.
I bet I could have sold rides to people's cars, in a warm cab, for $20 per trip easily.
There were 15,000+ people in that building tonight. Nearly all of them will have gotten to the game in a car. Those cars were spread across probably 100 acres, with temporary lots dotting the landscape all around.
As I was sitting, waiting for my frozen thunder-truck to reach some semblance of heated, I took note of the outside air temperature. It was being reported to me as -31 C.
I bet I could have sold rides to people's cars, in a warm cab, for $20 per trip easily.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Its time for the annual guessing game!
We are amending the rules this year to compensate for the World Junior Hockey Championships. Tips for 2009 ended with the Blades game on Dec. 16th. That was the last event I worked, in 2009, not counting the WJHC. Thus tips for the year are considered to have ended with that event.
The WJHC will have its own guessing game, after the last game on Jan. 5.
Here are your hints:
We are amending the rules this year to compensate for the World Junior Hockey Championships. Tips for 2009 ended with the Blades game on Dec. 16th. That was the last event I worked, in 2009, not counting the WJHC. Thus tips for the year are considered to have ended with that event.
The WJHC will have its own guessing game, after the last game on Jan. 5.
Here are your hints:
