What's with all the spam on MSN lately? I'm just sitting here minding my own business, and suddenly girls with obviously fake Hotmail addresses (maybe obviously fake girls?) are messaging me, offering to send me pics, chat with me, or (maybe) do something naughty on a webcam.

First of all, why would this approach to marketing work? Is it random? Are there 12 year old girls getting the same messages as me? If so, how many of them want to see naked pics of Millicent?

Second of all, STOP MESSAGING ME!!! I know how to find pictures of girls on the internet. I don't need you to send me any. Besides, the pictures you'd be sending aren't of the person on the other side of the chat window. Everyone lies on the internet. I know the hot, redhead coming down the runway isn't the person on the other side of the text. I'm pretty sure I'm chatting with an over-weight, bad complexion, balding 36-year old man from the Ukraine, earning 14 rubles a day, trying to convince stupid, horny men North American men to give them their credit card number.