Saturday, April 05, 2008
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Do you know what really grinds my gears?
I’m playing EA hockey on my Playstation Portable today at lunch. It took me a whopping 6 minutes to eat my sandwich, banana and granola bar, so I had time to kill. What’s easier to play in 20 minutes than a game of hockey? Nothing I could think of, so I fire up the game.
I set it to Edmonton versus Carolina. I believe that’s the default when you load it up, because they were the finalists from the version of the game that I own. I made the mistake of not flipping the teams to make Edmonton home. Thus I had to play the whole game going down the ice, instead of up, which I would prefer.
Despite that layout anomaly, I was owning the Hurricanes. It wasn’t even close. It was 17-5 in shots after two periods, and I had a 2-0 lead. They couldn’t even get over my blue-line to get a shot. I won the opening face-off of the third period, drove into their end, and after junking it up on the boards for awhile, I popped a third goal into their net. 3-0 for Edmonton, 18 minutes and changes to play. (I had it set for 5 minute (real-time) periods) So realistically, there wasn’t much game for them to make a come-back.
So the first thing that happens is on the ensuing face-off at center ice, the computer wins it, dekes past my centerman, and pops off a shot at the blue line, with a defenseman all over him. Guess what happens? Of course, he scores on that crummy shot. There is no way a professional goalie, even a bad one, gives up that goal in real life, in a real game, with 18 minutes and change to play. It just doesn’t happen.
Game resumes and I’m all over them again. I drive into their end like I have a dozen times already. But now I can’t get a shot to the net. They are blocking everything or tying up my wingers so I can’t get a one-timer off. So I’ll skate in, pass, and either get a weak shot, or no shot, and the puck ends up in the corner. They drive out, my defensemen knock them down at the blue-line, and the cycle repeats itself.
So we get to the 12 minute mark and they drive into my end. My defensemen are on them, and there’s no shot. Their guy passes it from beside the net, all the way back to the right defense. (I know, WTF!?!). My computer guy jumps on him right away. Nevertheless he gets off a weak shot from there, with a guy on him. Goalie misses it, now its 3-2. What In The F is going on!?!
Now I’m going hard on defense because it’s clear the game is rigged. I win face-offs, skate deep into my end, make them chase me, and then do a rush. It’s harder to deke in their end so I’m losing the puck a lot when I get there. So I start shooting. That’s a mistake. 3 minutes to go they get the puck on the right, pass to an open guy on the left. He shoots from just inside the blue line and they score again, on another piece of junk shot. Now its TIED!
I won’t bore you with the details. We go to over-time. They get the puck in my end. There is a huge pile in front of the goal. Their guy shoots the puck and it makes it over this mess and goes in the top corner. The physics of the shot were completely impossible. Nevertheless because the computer cheats I went from winning 3-0, to losing 4-3 in overtime.
It makes a guy want to quit gaming altogether. Maybe I should take up knitting.
I’m playing EA hockey on my Playstation Portable today at lunch. It took me a whopping 6 minutes to eat my sandwich, banana and granola bar, so I had time to kill. What’s easier to play in 20 minutes than a game of hockey? Nothing I could think of, so I fire up the game.
I set it to Edmonton versus Carolina. I believe that’s the default when you load it up, because they were the finalists from the version of the game that I own. I made the mistake of not flipping the teams to make Edmonton home. Thus I had to play the whole game going down the ice, instead of up, which I would prefer.
Despite that layout anomaly, I was owning the Hurricanes. It wasn’t even close. It was 17-5 in shots after two periods, and I had a 2-0 lead. They couldn’t even get over my blue-line to get a shot. I won the opening face-off of the third period, drove into their end, and after junking it up on the boards for awhile, I popped a third goal into their net. 3-0 for Edmonton, 18 minutes and changes to play. (I had it set for 5 minute (real-time) periods) So realistically, there wasn’t much game for them to make a come-back.
So the first thing that happens is on the ensuing face-off at center ice, the computer wins it, dekes past my centerman, and pops off a shot at the blue line, with a defenseman all over him. Guess what happens? Of course, he scores on that crummy shot. There is no way a professional goalie, even a bad one, gives up that goal in real life, in a real game, with 18 minutes and change to play. It just doesn’t happen.
Game resumes and I’m all over them again. I drive into their end like I have a dozen times already. But now I can’t get a shot to the net. They are blocking everything or tying up my wingers so I can’t get a one-timer off. So I’ll skate in, pass, and either get a weak shot, or no shot, and the puck ends up in the corner. They drive out, my defensemen knock them down at the blue-line, and the cycle repeats itself.
So we get to the 12 minute mark and they drive into my end. My defensemen are on them, and there’s no shot. Their guy passes it from beside the net, all the way back to the right defense. (I know, WTF!?!). My computer guy jumps on him right away. Nevertheless he gets off a weak shot from there, with a guy on him. Goalie misses it, now its 3-2. What In The F is going on!?!
Now I’m going hard on defense because it’s clear the game is rigged. I win face-offs, skate deep into my end, make them chase me, and then do a rush. It’s harder to deke in their end so I’m losing the puck a lot when I get there. So I start shooting. That’s a mistake. 3 minutes to go they get the puck on the right, pass to an open guy on the left. He shoots from just inside the blue line and they score again, on another piece of junk shot. Now its TIED!
I won’t bore you with the details. We go to over-time. They get the puck in my end. There is a huge pile in front of the goal. Their guy shoots the puck and it makes it over this mess and goes in the top corner. The physics of the shot were completely impossible. Nevertheless because the computer cheats I went from winning 3-0, to losing 4-3 in overtime.
It makes a guy want to quit gaming altogether. Maybe I should take up knitting.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Do you know what really grinds my gears?
Today is March 31. Its not July. The temperature was -2 C, with an overcast sky and a few sprinkles of snow coming down. It was not a hospitable day. You certainly wouldn't contemplate an outdoor activity for the sport of it.
I'm coming out of Zellers with my cat supplies and going in the opposite direction. He's got on shorts, and a shirt with the arms cut off. Frankly, it looked like he was on his way to a pick-up basketball game on some outdoor, asphalt court.
What the hell is everyone's hurry for it to be summer? Its cold and miserable out. Wear cold/miserable clothing. The world is not going to end if you don't wear shorts. Pants are a perfectly acceptable fashion choice.
So this asshole will go without proper clothing in the name of style and probably end up with a staph infection at some point. Stupidity usually knows no bounds. Then he'll be taken to a doctor with a fever and fits and they'll pump $600 worth of anti-biotics into him. The bill for that will end up on the desk of the local health region, which I am funding because I pay my taxes. So the result is, as it always is, that I gotta pay for this ass clown to be stupid.
Anyone got an idea when we're gonna get a clue about how we SHOULD be dealing with problems like this?
Today is March 31. Its not July. The temperature was -2 C, with an overcast sky and a few sprinkles of snow coming down. It was not a hospitable day. You certainly wouldn't contemplate an outdoor activity for the sport of it.
I'm coming out of Zellers with my cat supplies and going in the opposite direction. He's got on shorts, and a shirt with the arms cut off. Frankly, it looked like he was on his way to a pick-up basketball game on some outdoor, asphalt court.
What the hell is everyone's hurry for it to be summer? Its cold and miserable out. Wear cold/miserable clothing. The world is not going to end if you don't wear shorts. Pants are a perfectly acceptable fashion choice.
So this asshole will go without proper clothing in the name of style and probably end up with a staph infection at some point. Stupidity usually knows no bounds. Then he'll be taken to a doctor with a fever and fits and they'll pump $600 worth of anti-biotics into him. The bill for that will end up on the desk of the local health region, which I am funding because I pay my taxes. So the result is, as it always is, that I gotta pay for this ass clown to be stupid.
Anyone got an idea when we're gonna get a clue about how we SHOULD be dealing with problems like this?
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Monday, March 24, 2008
Blog Question Of The Day:
So, I watched the episode of 'How I Met Your Mother' tonight. This was the one were Britney Spears guest starred as a receptionist.
By most accounts it looks like Britney is getting her act together. This is no doubt because her dad is smacking her on the ass when she screws up. Nevertheless:
Do we think Britney is hot again, now that's she's cleaned up her act?
So, I watched the episode of 'How I Met Your Mother' tonight. This was the one were Britney Spears guest starred as a receptionist.
By most accounts it looks like Britney is getting her act together. This is no doubt because her dad is smacking her on the ass when she screws up. Nevertheless:
Do we think Britney is hot again, now that's she's cleaned up her act?
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Saturday, March 22, 2008
I have come to a painful yet inevitable conclusion. There is a sub-set of ordinary females that is completely out of their mind.
Today was a cold day. Not a frigid winter day but despite the shining sun it was not warm. It was not spring warm, or even March warm. There was a definite chill in the air. You needed to be wearing a winter-type jacket to stay comfortable outside.
To my own discredit, I went to the mall on a holiday Saturday. This does not speak well to my own sanity. Nevertheless I went and it is there that I witnessed this lunacy. I was walking across the parking lot, having just visited the ABM. I wasn't really thinking about anything in particular, other than I felt like an idiot visiting the mall when it was busy. I looked up and coming towards me was a girl. Its becoming increasingly difficult for me to correctly judge people's ages. Nevertheless I'm going to peg this girl at about 20.
I was wearing jeans, and my winter jacket which is a reasonably warm, leather coat. My hair is only a week longer than shaved to the scalp. I was comfortable enough but by no means warm. Coming towards me was a girl, about 20 years old, and approximately 5'3" tall. She was wearing silly looking sunglasses and a mediocre looking jacket. It was more than a sweater but less than my jacket. Combined with that was shorts. Not short pants, or some kind of stylish fashion-oriented pants. These were shorts. Summer-time, lets go for a walk on the beach, shorts.
And giant, fuzzy moon boots.
WHAT THE HELL!?!
Its warm enough for shorts and yet still wear moon boots? How do you come to that conclusion? Let's try and imagine the thought process:
"You know, like, it looks so nice outside, I think I'll wear shorts. I love the sun!"
"Oh poo, there's still snow on the ground. That's like SOOO unfair. Boo! I guess I'll wear boots"
WHAT THE HELL!?!
Doesn't anyone think anymore? When its cold, wear cold weather clothes. When its GENUINELY warm, then break out the summer clothes. But don't mix/match the two so you go out looking like a semi-retarded idiot that's on a day-pass from the loony bin.
Today was a cold day. Not a frigid winter day but despite the shining sun it was not warm. It was not spring warm, or even March warm. There was a definite chill in the air. You needed to be wearing a winter-type jacket to stay comfortable outside.
To my own discredit, I went to the mall on a holiday Saturday. This does not speak well to my own sanity. Nevertheless I went and it is there that I witnessed this lunacy. I was walking across the parking lot, having just visited the ABM. I wasn't really thinking about anything in particular, other than I felt like an idiot visiting the mall when it was busy. I looked up and coming towards me was a girl. Its becoming increasingly difficult for me to correctly judge people's ages. Nevertheless I'm going to peg this girl at about 20.
I was wearing jeans, and my winter jacket which is a reasonably warm, leather coat. My hair is only a week longer than shaved to the scalp. I was comfortable enough but by no means warm. Coming towards me was a girl, about 20 years old, and approximately 5'3" tall. She was wearing silly looking sunglasses and a mediocre looking jacket. It was more than a sweater but less than my jacket. Combined with that was shorts. Not short pants, or some kind of stylish fashion-oriented pants. These were shorts. Summer-time, lets go for a walk on the beach, shorts.
And giant, fuzzy moon boots.
WHAT THE HELL!?!
Its warm enough for shorts and yet still wear moon boots? How do you come to that conclusion? Let's try and imagine the thought process:
"You know, like, it looks so nice outside, I think I'll wear shorts. I love the sun!"
"Oh poo, there's still snow on the ground. That's like SOOO unfair. Boo! I guess I'll wear boots"
WHAT THE HELL!?!
Doesn't anyone think anymore? When its cold, wear cold weather clothes. When its GENUINELY warm, then break out the summer clothes. But don't mix/match the two so you go out looking like a semi-retarded idiot that's on a day-pass from the loony bin.
Friday, March 21, 2008
Do you know what really grinds my gears?
Let's say you go to your average, social news site? Something that is populated by links to content that is created by amateurs, or semi-amateurs. There's nothing wrong with the content, its just not as polished as you might find on an MSN or Yahoo.
umb
I like these sites but one that drives me nuts is the pictures. What the hell is wrong with these people? They create a page about something and include a collection of thumbnails at the bottom that you can click for a better image related to the story. So you click the thumbnail and it proceeds to load a page with a version of the picture that is MAYBE 25% larger than the thumbnail itself.
What the point? What's the freakin' point!?! If you don't have a version of the picture that is actually worthy of being contained on a separate page but only have thumbnail or low resolution versions of the photo, then don't toy with me. Just post the thumbnails and leave it at that. I just hate when I click a little image, expecting a big image, and instead get a slightly blown up version of the original small picture.
Let's say you go to your average, social news site? Something that is populated by links to content that is created by amateurs, or semi-amateurs. There's nothing wrong with the content, its just not as polished as you might find on an MSN or Yahoo.
umb
I like these sites but one that drives me nuts is the pictures. What the hell is wrong with these people? They create a page about something and include a collection of thumbnails at the bottom that you can click for a better image related to the story. So you click the thumbnail and it proceeds to load a page with a version of the picture that is MAYBE 25% larger than the thumbnail itself.
What the point? What's the freakin' point!?! If you don't have a version of the picture that is actually worthy of being contained on a separate page but only have thumbnail or low resolution versions of the photo, then don't toy with me. Just post the thumbnails and leave it at that. I just hate when I click a little image, expecting a big image, and instead get a slightly blown up version of the original small picture.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
In ancient Greece (469-399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance, who ran up to him excitedly and said, “Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students…?”
“Wait a moment,” Socrates replied. “Before you tell me, I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Test of Three.”
“Test of Three?”
“That’s correct,” Socrates continued. “Before you talk to me about my student let’s take a moment to test what you’re going to say. The first test is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?”
“No,” the man replied, “actually I just heard about it.”
“All right,” said Socrates. “So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now let’s try the second test, the test of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?”
“No, on the contrary it’s…”
So,” Socrates continued, “you want to tell me something bad about him even though you’re not certain it’s true?”
The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.
Socrates continued, “You may still pass though because there is a third test — the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?”
“Err..no, not really..”
“Well,” concluded Socrates, “if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?”
Defeated and ashamed the man said no more. This is the reason Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high esteem.
It also explains why Socrates never found out that Plato was shagging his wife.
“Wait a moment,” Socrates replied. “Before you tell me, I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Test of Three.”
“Test of Three?”
“That’s correct,” Socrates continued. “Before you talk to me about my student let’s take a moment to test what you’re going to say. The first test is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?”
“No,” the man replied, “actually I just heard about it.”
“All right,” said Socrates. “So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now let’s try the second test, the test of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?”
“No, on the contrary it’s…”
So,” Socrates continued, “you want to tell me something bad about him even though you’re not certain it’s true?”
The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.
Socrates continued, “You may still pass though because there is a third test — the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?”
“Err..no, not really..”
“Well,” concluded Socrates, “if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?”
Defeated and ashamed the man said no more. This is the reason Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high esteem.
It also explains why Socrates never found out that Plato was shagging his wife.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Sunday, March 16, 2008
I have a question.
I've been reading about this Eliot Spitzer dude in New York who just had his whole world brought to his knees over prostitution. This made me think of something.
Why are we regulating sex in this way? I thought we'd all agreed, when we, as a society, decided we weren't going to give homosexuals a problem anymore, that we were going to get out of the bedroom of people. Now its right back in there we go.
Here's my question. Why do we get out of the bedroom of gays, and not make their activities illegal, yet we do get into the bedroom of two people because one gives the other money?
I've been reading about this Eliot Spitzer dude in New York who just had his whole world brought to his knees over prostitution. This made me think of something.
Why are we regulating sex in this way? I thought we'd all agreed, when we, as a society, decided we weren't going to give homosexuals a problem anymore, that we were going to get out of the bedroom of people. Now its right back in there we go.
Here's my question. Why do we get out of the bedroom of gays, and not make their activities illegal, yet we do get into the bedroom of two people because one gives the other money?
I shouldn't have to get pissed off about things like this. But I went to the Chicago Tribune web site. I wanted to read an article about Barack Obama. My computer proceeded to sieze up completely with 96% RAM usage as Spamasaurus Rex attacked me.
Why can't I go to a completely innocuous web site like the god damn Chicago Tribune site, and not be deluged by pop-ups and spam advertising!?! Why is this? Who are the idiots that are getting sucked in by pop-up advertising? Really!?! After this much time is anyone still falling for this bullshit marketing!?!
Its the damn shot-gun approach that is taken to everything lately. If you beat enough people with enough baseball bats, eventually someone goes down from it. If I send a million pieces of spam, someone with inadvertently click it and I'll get the 3 cent page click-through. ARRGGGHHHH!!!! This crap has to stop. Can't you just sell something people actually want and stop trying to steal our money!?!
Why can't I go to a completely innocuous web site like the god damn Chicago Tribune site, and not be deluged by pop-ups and spam advertising!?! Why is this? Who are the idiots that are getting sucked in by pop-up advertising? Really!?! After this much time is anyone still falling for this bullshit marketing!?!
Its the damn shot-gun approach that is taken to everything lately. If you beat enough people with enough baseball bats, eventually someone goes down from it. If I send a million pieces of spam, someone with inadvertently click it and I'll get the 3 cent page click-through. ARRGGGHHHH!!!! This crap has to stop. Can't you just sell something people actually want and stop trying to steal our money!?!